This makes me wonder a lot lately, partly because I'm listening to a closeted friend talk about whether or not he should come out and partly because just once I would like to see a straight person be forced to be gay and know what it's like to not live your life the way it was meant to be. The closeted person I'm talking about is married, middle aged, and has teenage kids. His entire life has been about living a life of repression and frustration. And there's nothing anyone can do. He has to draw his own conclusions.
It's just important to know and understand that some things are ridiculous...like this:
An ex-gay group...meaning they are still most likely attracted to men but don't act on their natural instincts any longer...put up a billboard that says "Nobody Is Born Gay." It appeared on I -95 near Richmond, VA, an area I know is well frequented by people traveling from Maine to Florida on the east cost. The group responsible for this is PFOX which stands for Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays and Gays. Ironic how they worked "Fox" into that.
Those of us who aren't laughing at these blithering pathetic idiots, don't seem too thrilled about the billboard by any means, and rightly so.
Some who have seen the billboard on I-95 expressed their disgust to WWBT.
"We do not know why people are heterosexual," Bill Harrison with the Richmond Gay Community told the network. "Maybe when we figure that out, we can determine why some people are not. What we do know is that this type of therapy has caused many people to commit suicide."
The rest of the article explains more about these "ex-gays" and how they claim they can "cure" people from being gay. They never once mention whether or not the "cure" prevents men from being attracted to other men, or how they can get a gay man attracted to a vagina (which is the most basic principle, though admittedly crude). They only mention how they can make people NOT gay...as if gay is a concept and not an intrinsic way of life you're born with. But frankly, I can't even begin to imagine how it must suck to live with that kind of self-loathing. And I've read my own horror stories about how dangerous conversion therapy can be.
You can read the rest here. I knew I was gay at 3 years old. I was born gay. I didn't know or understand the word gay. But I knew I liked watching those male lifeguards on the beach. I also know and understand a little about behavioral and cognitive therapy, and both can be used in negative or positive ways.
Aside from the fact that I feel sorry for the guys who buy into this ridiculous concept of conversion therapy because it can be so psychologically dangerous from a behavioral and cognitive POV, the billboard doesn't bother me in the least. I know who I am, thank you. Feel free to waste your free speech anywhere you want.
Lance Bass' Gay Bachelor Party
God knows I've been to more than my fair share of the fresh hells of heterosexual male bachelor parties. I've been to hotels, to restaurants, and even once to a strip bar called Delila's Den in Philadelphia where some topless, large-breasted woman tried to aggressively rub her pointed little ninny pies in my face. In fact, I can't imagine much worse for any gay man to go through than a straight male bachelor party. So this article about Lance Bass' gay bachelor party is something I've been waiting for all my life.
The 35-year-old *NSYNC star told TMZ that the festivities, which were held at The Abbey in West Hollywood, were a complete surprise. Joey Fatone, Alan Thicke and comedian Fortune Feimster were among those in attendance at the party, which reportedly featured penis-shaped favors and a beefcake photo of Bass.
"It makes me feel like a human being," Bass told TMZ. "It was a complete surprise."
This week, Bass confirmed to E! News that all of his *NSYNC bandmates will be in attendance at his nuptials, with the exception of Justin Timberlake, who is wrapping up his "20/20 Experience" concert tour.
You can read the rest here. I understand the part about how he feels like a human being. You have to be gay to get that. You can research, ask friends, do a poll, but this is one thing you'll never know or understand unless you are gay.
Still Bitter At Bill Clinton
Here's a commentary piece written by Julie R. Enszer about how she still feels bitter with regard to Bill Clinton and DOMA. One reason is the way he's still putting a spin on it to get LGBT support now, and another is that he's never formally apologized for signing DOMA. Speaking personally, I can remember when DOMA happened and I remember the feeling of absolute hopelessness back then, thanks to Clinton.
In any event, here's a quote:
I'm still bitter, Bill. While other gay and lesbian people applauded and cheered, I sat in disbelief. I still remember the day you signed DOMA. The anger. The disappointment. The despair. I still remember watching states pass gay-marriage prohibitions quite easily. I cannot forget, and I cannot forgive until there is a proper apology. Even then, I am never going to be prepared to give you credit for the advancements of marriage equality. I want to be better than all of this bitterness, Bill, but I want you to be better too. Man up. Apologize with some sincerity. The stress and pain you caused millions of gay and lesbian people cannot easily be forgiven.
You can read it all here. It's not a long post, but it hits hard. I know a lot of you have been willing to forgive Clinton and make all kinds of excuses for him, the same way so many have made excuses for President Obama without even realizing how he's used LGBT people to divert and get attention at the right times...not to mention money, but I agree more with this commentary. And I'm not willing to apologize and settle for less anymore. The stress and pain DOMA caused us all is not something I'm willing to forget either.
Sidenote: nothing is mentioned about the six figure fee Bill probably got paid to speak the the HRC, and no one has commented on the post so far.
Chase of a Christmas Dream