Thursday, October 30, 2014

Bad News For Bottoms; Gay Bottom vs. Bottom; Gay Porn Reality TV; Don't Pee on His Floor

Bad News For Bottoms

I try to take these things seriously, but the tone of the article is so light it's not always easy.

There was a study done in Canada with men who are straight and men who are gay. And in their findings they discovered that gay men who bottom are more likely to get prostate cancer. But you have to have slept with more than 20 different men, and bottomed, each time.(I guess that also means you should be keeping track????)

Parent’s team found that guys who have sex with more than 20 male partners doubled their risk of prostate cancer. And their risk of getting a non-aggressive cancer was five times more likely.

How come?

Parent has no idea.

But Dr. David Samadi, chairman of urology at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City, thinks he knows why. According to Health Daily, Samadi speculated that it could be due to more risky sexual behaviors among gay men, or because of physical trauma to the prostate gland.

It says nothing about guys who only bottom who are married or in long term monogamous relationships. Maybe the assumption is they aren't getting it as much with the same top/husband? You know, marriage tends to do that to couples, gay or straight, at various times (it's normal). But even still, I would imagine it would all balance out in the end, so to speak. Same guy vs. more than twenty on a fairly regular basis?

In any event, there's more here. And I highly suggest reading the comments. I love this one:

First off I’m just stating a fact,I don’t like getting topped,second I only top if my partner wants me too.

I guess he made his point clear. 

Gay Bottom vs. Bottom

On another note, speaking of bottoms, I like to revisit this topic every so often. And here's a thread at Data Lounge where this question is asked:

"What happens when a bottom dates a bottom and a top dates a top?"

I would imagine the answer to both would be nothing all that least for the most part. I think this topic is always highly underestimated and overlooked with gay men when they are dating because it can be such an awkward topic in the beginning. And sometimes shocking. You're with this hot guy, he's the masculine man of your dreams and looks just like a football player, and then you start making out and his legs go up. Not fun. Unfortunately, I don't have a solution because all circumstances with all gay men/couples are different. Always different just like straight couples. If you really care about a guy you'll figure it out one way or the other.

But the comment thread is interesting. Here's one:

Most often Bottoms find out that their date was not actually versatile, but another lying bottom, so they gossip.\ \ Tops dating each other, is an internal problem. Tops should look for Bottoms like Cake looks for Icing. Some Tops don't want the Femme Bottoms and that is an internal conflict. The mentally healthy top, quite enjoys Femme Bottoms and like wise.

That's cake looks for icing!!!!

Gay Porn Reality TV

In full disclosure, I didn't even know there was such a thing until a short time porn reality TV. Evidently, there is and there are at least five gay porn reality TV shows.

Talk of the long-awaited Broke Straight Boys TV show has taken hold of the gay porn industry again this week as the reality-inspired gay porn series gets its first trailer treatment in nearly a year.

The show that was originally peddled as a crossover reality show that followed the lives of several heterosexual gay-for-pay porn models dealing with the effect the gay porn industry had on their lives and relationships.

You can read more here, where there's a list of the five best (and worst) gay porn reality shows. One of which happens to be titled,  “So You Think You Can Fuck.” Now there's some reality for you.

Don't Pee On His Floor

It's Friday. It's been a long week. No one I know has a stress-free life. So I like to post about things that lean toward the ridiculous sometimes. And this is one of them. A gay florist in Atlanta is now speaking up because he's tired of people peeing on his floor. 

The incident happened at East Point Flower Cottage on Main located in the East Point neighborhood of Atlanta. Ramey has been a business owner in the area for more than 25 years.

“She was saying she needed a restroom right now and she didn’t make it,” Ramey told local news station WSB. “I mean, it was right in my showroom floor. It was very humiliating for her. I felt really bad for her.”

I wonder if he made her clean it up. In any event, a lot of this is because a nearby bus station closed up the rest rooms and people don't know where else to go...literally.

It's actually a very interesting article that goes on to discuss a gay bar he owns and what happened there in 2009 with a police raid that was eventually ruled illegal.

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

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Rosie O'Donnell's Depression Mocked; Ableist Language; Rapper Mykki Blanco on Straight Perspective; Keanu Reeves Gay Kiss Photo

Rosie O'Donnell's Depression Mocked

There's been an interesting discussion about people dealing with various mental illnesses over at this blog all week. It talks about "ableist language" and how people use words like "crazy" and "nuts" as pejoratives online without ever taking into consideration these words have power and they leave a strong impact on people with mental illnesses. To make this clearer, ableist language is the use of disability metaphors and I think this article gives a good simple explanation:

Disability metaphors abound in our culture, and they exist almost entirely as pejoratives. You see something wrong? Compare it to a disabled body or mind: Paralyzed. Lame. Crippled. Schizophrenic. Diseased. Sick. Want to launch an insult? The words are seemingly endless: Deaf. Dumb. Blind. Idiot. Moron. Imbecile. Crazy. Insane. Retard. Lunatic. Psycho. Spaz.

Former The View co-host, Sherri Shepherd, recently did an interview and she was quoted mocking current The View co-host, Rosie O'Donnell with sarcastic comments about Rosie's depression and it didn't come off well at all. In fact, I think this could be the kind of thing that finally tips to scales in favor of NOT referring to people with mental illnesses this way in the future. And Shepherd should be called to task on this just like anyone else who crosses the lines of civility.

Shepherd kicked off her Rosie ribbing by lifting up her leg which O'Donnell did during her first show this season. O'Donnell returned to the show after quitting in 2007 after one stormy year. 

'Here's my foot, I'm Rosie O'Donnell!' Shepherd joked. 'I got sciatica in my back and I'm going through depression. ... How many other ailments can I get? I got 12 more in the year that I'll be on The View. There you go. 'You wanna see my feet? There's my feet. I'm Rosie O'Donnell.'

Shepherd, in this case, didn't use ableist language, however, in mocking O'Donnell the implication is there and it's as bad as mocking someone with cancer or HIV/AIDS. Maybe I take this too seriously because I come from a background with a mother and father who are retired therapists, but I think this sort of thing needs to stop. Words have meaning and power. And we all need to be made aware of it. The next time you feel like ranting that someone is "batshit crazy," or whatever, please think twice about it. That's the only way to change it. And if you see someone do this, call them out.  

You can read the rest about Rosie O'Donnell here.

Rapper Mykki Blanco Straight Perspective

Mykki Blanco, openly gay rapper, isn't concerned with what straight people think of his music within the industry. And, most important, he's not concerned with how they critique it.

 ‘A large part of my fan base is gay and those are my people,’ the California raised rapper and performance artist said. 

‘They're the people I represent. I always want to reinforce to my fans that regardless of any issue with homosexuality that people want to debate about, it's about owning your sexuality and not allowing the heterosexual world to think they can critique it -- no one is critiquing heterosexuality. 

‘Don't allow society to put who you are into this petri dish like it's a topic for discussion. 

 ‘That's why I say, ‘‘A straight man's respect doesn't mean shit to me,’’ because so many people will condescendingly say to me, ‘‘Oh you really are a good rapper.’’ What they're really trying to say is, ‘‘you’re a really good rapper for being gay’’.’

I personally find this interesting because I see straight people critiquing gay fiction and mm romance almost every single day of the week. And they do this as if they are the all time experts. I'm not talking about straight people writing gay fiction. I'm talking about the way straight people critique gay fiction. I agree with Blanco. Don't tell me how to be gay and I won't tell you how to be straight. Fair and simple.

You can read the rest here. I'm glad someone's finally speaking up about this. I think we're all reaching the point, in music and in books, where enough is finally enough.

Keanu Reeves Gay Kiss Photo

I don't know about anyone else, but the first time I saw a Keanu Reeves movie my heart stopped and I became his fan for life. As far as I know, he's never said or done anything stupid in public, which is a novelty these days. There's just something about that man and they way he speaks, acts, and moves. It's the whole package..the whole man. And as he grows older he's getting even better.

Evidently, I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Keanu Reeves is one of those actors that you don’t think about for a few years, and then suddenly he’s back with another hit and you wonder where he’s been your whole life. Now with a solid 30 years in show biz under his belt, he really has quite the career to show for himself.

I don't think Reeves has ever done any full frontal nudity in film, however, they've put together a list of photos of him here. It's worth checking out, especially the Wolfboy photos and the gay kiss.

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

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Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Gay Tricking and Leaving Gracefully; Gay Men And Straight Women Debacle; Top Jock This Year

Gay Tricking and Leaving Gracefully

I'll admit a lot has changed for gay men in the past decade. There's been a great deal of assimilation thanks to TV shows like Modern Family and aggressive gay personalities like Neil Patrick Harris who will do anything for attention and money. The gay bar is practically dead, and the gay ghetto is a place where only people over a certain age go to live...and that's even changing. And there's nothing wrong with all of this, not by a long shot. However, the one thing that hasn't changed is that gay men cruise, they still pick up tricks, they still have one night stands, and they take off as soon as the sex is over. Thank you very much; I'll call you sometime.

This article talks about how to make a graceful exit after one of those one night stands with a trick you hardly remember. In some cases I would imagine it's the old one hour stand.

Ah, the blacked-out one night stand — a rite of passage for any self-disrespecting gay man with a penchant for destructive behavior. It’s the kind of story that kills it in the dorm cafeteria between rounds of everlasting pizza dipped in ranch, but as you get older and the story stays the same, it starts to sound a lot less cute.

There's more here, with a video from Go-Go Boy Interrupted. I thought it was funny and it's refreshing to see things like this that break the stereotypes everyone's always seen on TV shows like Sex and the City. It's also refreshing to see more gay men being represented in different ways.

Gay Men and Straight Women Friends Debacle

I want to begin this part of the post by stating I've always had many different types of friends. Straight women and straight men, lesbians and gay men. My friends vary in age, too. And to be honest, like most gay men, I never gave this next topic much thought. But when I saw this post today I couldn't just ignore it. I even left my own comment at the bottom and I rarely ever do that. It just bothered me so much because it's so wrong on so many levels. It's not only insulting to women and gay men, it perpetuates the worst stereotypes for both.

First, the title of the post reads this way:  Why Gay Men and Straight Women Make The Best of Friends: 4 Great Reasons. The title alone screams UGH! And then the article goes into why, according to this guy, gay men and straight women are best friends.

Get this crap:

You see, the trusted "gay best friend" helps offset the frustration of navigating a world of bitchy girls and bozo boys, and of course we empathize with your raging, mood-swingy hormones, too. (Well, everything except those menstrual cycles. We’re not quite sure what to do with those even though we have our own version of them). So, why is a gay guy a great friend to have around? For several reasons: 

We Admire and Adore You
Let’s start with a confession ... we gay men/boys dig you girls way more then we let on. We’re actually kind of jealous of you. Not because you get all the great fashion. Our jealousy comes from the fact that your feminine energy has a way of making the male species become putty in your hands. True, we can do that, too, just not as well as you can. And, we watch you a lot. We’re dying to learn all your tricks for manipulating guys into doing anything you want. (Of course, let’s be truthful girls, manipulation shouldn’t be something we’re proud of unless it means manipulating a better deal on a pair of shoes … right?)

I've read a lot of douchebaggery and WTF-ery in my day. I've seen more than my fair share of insulting discussions about gay men on book blogs that focus on romance. But this one makes the top ten of all time. "Raging, mood-swingy hormones?" "We're dying to learn all your tricks" And that's just a tip of what this douchecanoe, Rick Clemons, wrote on the topic of gay men and straight women.

I suggest you read it all just for the sake of seeing how the wrong people get pubbed over at Huff Po sometimes. I just hope younger gay men don't take any of this seriously. They make us all look like a freak show. I could post pages about how wrong this is, and talk about how it insults women and promotes passive aggressive homophobia by objectifying gay men and turning them into pet poodles. But when I read the other comments I could see that sometimes it's just best to keep it all plain and's one comment:
 Wrong. Sorry, just wrong on so many levels.

Now if you'll excuse me I have to run over to my best girlfriend's house to braid her hair while we talk about Debbie Macomber books and cry. NOT

Top Jock This Year

This article is commenting on how gays are making headway in sports and equality...even though Michael Sam is still having his issues. There's a list of the most popular who made headlines. And you can vote for whomever your personal favorite might be. I'm leaning toward a few I won't mention aloud. But one of them has always been someone I admired...Billy Bean.

Is it former major league outfielder Billy Bean, who was appointed by Major League Baseball this year to level the playing field for gay players, baseball personnel and fans?

Is it Chris Kluwe, the non-gay punter and advocate who exposed the homophobia of his former team, the Minnesota Vikings?

The courageous Michael Sam, the first openly gay player drafted by the NFL?

Here's a link to the article, where there's another link to vote. I think you can vote every day until 11/2/14.

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

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Tuesday, October 28, 2014

"Albert the Faggot?" Ellen's New Objectified Male Gardener; Big Rubber Sex Toy in Thailand

"Albert the Faggot?"

There are several facets of this article I found fascinating. First, a really great young guy came out of the closet in 2009 and his aunt asked him "When is it going to be okay to call you Albert the Faggot?"  The peculiar thing is that this aunt wasn't as upset and it sounds, as if she was supporting him. 

Then this happened:

Then she said this: 'So, you're already "Albert the Jew" and "Albert the [Georgetown University] Hoya." When's it going to be OK to call you "Albert the Faggot'?"'
Eisenberg paused then said to his aunt: 'Never, Aunt Marianne. It's never going to be OK to call me 'Albert the Faggot."'
- See more at:
Then she said this: 'So, you're already "Albert the Jew" and "Albert the [Georgetown University] Hoya." When's it going to be OK to call you "Albert the Faggot'?"' 

Eisenberg paused then said to his aunt: 'Never, Aunt Marianne. It's never going to be OK to call me 'Albert the Faggot."'

The aunt sounds like she could be a real asswipe.

After that, a friend congratulated him and said he was glad Albert was not like another effeminate gay he knew. In other words, the friend was saying, "You're one of the good ones." I think all minorities know how that goes. It's just that it's still okay to say this openly to gay people where it's not okay to say this openly about any other minority. 

It all leads up to a statement from Albert Eisenberg stating we all really need to work on these things a lot more because they're not going to be solved in court.

You can read it here, with a video clip. Side note: Albert is adorable and smart.

Ellen's New Objectified Male Gardener

I wish Ellen would take a lesson from Albert Eisenberg. I could be wrong about this, but I find it interesting that a women, a lesbian, like Ellen DeGeneres would make such a big thing about objectifying men when it's always been so wrong to objectify women in this way. If Jimmy Fallon were to do this with a sexy French maid every feminist on the planet would be going after him, and rightly so. It stands to reason. And even though it's not being discussed in public openly I can't believe other people aren't at least thinking this.

She’s accepting video auditions to be the new objectified green thumb, and recently showed off a few eligible candidates.

We’re not sure — are nude photos a set back or a leg up?

I know you all think this is funny-haha and Ellen's so cool and lesbian hip right now. And I'm taking it too seriously. But I'm actually not...not literally. I don't really give a damn if Ellen objectifies men, women or kangaroos. That's not my point. I think we all get too uptight about these things anyway. Some people, men and women, have made careers out of this kind of objectification and they've done well for themselves. And good for them. I just don't like double standards, especially when there's a hidden agenda involved.

Go ahead, Jimmy Fallon. You try this with a stereotypical female French maid and see where it gets you. I hear the word misogynist in the distance. But I don't hear anything about Ellen doing this to men. It goes both ways and you don't right one wrong by creating another.

The rest is here. 

Big Rubber Sex Toy in Thailand

In Thailand they allegedly found a huge rubber sex toy in a cave. This has caused a shitstorm in a small community, and rightly so, because the cave is supposed to be sacred and the big dildo is driving them to distraction. However, they aren't upset because it's a dildo, they're upset because it's factory made, not man made out of hardwood. Someone probably had good intentions, but missed the mark this time.

The offending item, which local media have described as “a large, pink faded sex toy,” was discovered in the Phra Nang Cave, nicknamed the “Phallus Shrine,” a place where locals leave dong-shaped offerings for a goddess named Phra Nang. But the rule is the offerings must be made out of wood, not rubber. Hence the village unrest.

“We believe it was left there by a tourist who doesn’t really understand local beliefs,” Komart Paenkerd, who works for the Krabi Provincial Cultural Office, told the Phuket Gazette.

The bottom line is that they'd like tourists to keep it more traditional and leave phallus symbols made out of wood...hardwood. They don't want generic sex toys you can buy in any Adult World bookstore.

You can read the rest here in case you're planning a trip to Thailand any time soon. It actually sounds very interesting to me and if I were going there I'd make a point to check this out.

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

.99 Gay E-book

Albert Eisenberg

Monday, October 27, 2014

Sean Eldridge Gay Politician; Disgusting Gay Guys; Straight/Bi-Sexual Men Who Have Gay Sex

Sean Eldridge Gay Politician

When I post about these things I'm only doing it from the POV where an openly LGBT person is running for political office. I don't care if the person is gay, lesbian, bi, or trans (or anything else that might fall into the category extension). I care about the LGBT factor. The article to which I'm linking, however, is more of a commentary about how money can't buy a political office. I highly disagree with that theory based on several recent campaigns larger than Eldridge's where some very powerful people won an election, in fact, due to money and power behind them. Money does win elections as much as charm, and they start spending that money years before the actual elections. 

However, all that aside, here's another LGBT political face to watch for in the future, Sean Eldridge. Even if he doesn't win this election I don't think we'll see him disappear any time soon.

Sean Eldridge has a lot going for him. He’s the son of two physicians and head of his own venture capital firm. He attended Harvard, where he met his husband-to-be, Chris Hughes. As one of the co-founders of Facebook, Hughes is fabulously wealthy, so the couple live comfortably in a $1.9 million house they bought in the Hudson Valley of New York.

What Eldridge will not have any time soon is a seat in Congress. Despite pouring nearly $2 million of his own money into a campaign to unseat incumbent Republican Chris Gibson, Eldridge is running well behind. Political observers have called Eldridge’s campaign “a flop,” and Eldridge has resorted to trumpeting an internal poll that shows him cutting GIbson lead in half: to ten percentage points. 

You can read the rest here. There's also a photo of Eldridge.

Disgusting Narcissistic Gay Guys

I guess it's no secret I often tend to post about things here that aren't always about baskets of kittens and things the PC police would like. But many times I see things that other people are wondering about in private and I don't see anything wrong in calling attention to it. And, trust me, I control myself. If I were to open up on some of the things I see in the book world alone this blog might implode.

In any event, here's a story about the two most disgusting gay guys on the planet. Evidently, narcissistic gay people are considered disgusting. It's short film about a highly exaggerated segment of the gay community focused on two "disgusting" gay men who find fault in everything. Unfortunately, there's a good deal of truth to this. 

“The disgustings are all around and they do not hide,” he said. “In some ways, we are all the disgustings. I wanted to make a film about flawed and insecure people that are really hurting. I think we often see ‘bitchy’ characters, but we rarely get to see their pain.”

Firstman’s 12-minute short has played numerous film fests around the country and he revealed that it was his intention to make audiences both cringe and relate at the same time.

It's being billed a comedy, but it could be the saddest thing I've seen all year. These two should try that routine they did in the restaurant to a waitress on the east coast. They'd never be the same two disgusting PC queens again.

You can see for yourselves, here. 

Straight/Bi-Sexual Men Who Have Gay Sex

This concept of straight men being more bi-sexual than people realize is always interesting to me because I've often found so-called straight men can be highly aggressive with gay men, from personal experience.

According to a pornhub survey the second highest topic in searches is gay male porn and it comes from straight women. That doesn't surprise me. Most of my readers are women and I understand what motivates them. I get it. But this next piece of information is something I'm still trying to figure out:  

In our research, we learned that straight men don’t just watch gay porn for sex tips. They also watch it to get off. Now, we weren’t born yesterday. Anyone can say they’re heterosexual, and plenty of gay guys on our favorite hookup sites pretend to “Str8″ and “just looking for a quickie while the GF is outta town.” But hold your preconceived notions for just one moment. Isn’t it possible there are more gray areas in human sexuality than anyone really knows, or is at least willing to admit? And isn’t looking at porn in the privacy of one’s own home the safest place to explore one’s curiosities?

I have never once been to a wedding where a straight man, with his wife and kids in the same room, didn't try to hit on me. It's always aggressive and always done with a few drinks. And I'm not talking about gay weddings. In fact, in my life I've always been approached more by straight men than gay men. I don't know what that says about me or the subconscious signals I'm giving off, but I'm not doing it consciously and at this point I could live without it. It actually gets on my nerves because I don't understand it. 

You can read the rest here.

Here's just one comment from a guy who is supposedly straight, verbatim for the grammar police: 

im str8 but ive masturbated with my friends and one time one of my friends and i started oral, then it lead to anal. ive wanted to try again because it felt so good but im afraid to bring it up again. so i masturbate and think about it insted.

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

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Sunday, October 26, 2014

Male Foreskin: Cut or Uncut; Gay Marriage Six More States; Genderqueer Identification

Male Foreskin: Cut or Uncut

I always find the various opinions about foreskin and circumcision interesting because when it's time to take sides the lines are always clearly drawn...from what I've always seen. Most gay men tend to prefer uncut, straight women prefer cut. I'm not sure about straight men, but this article actually does factor in a straight guy.

Cosmo did a short survey:

Gay guy #1 

“I have never thought too much about the possibility,” Man #1 said. “I feel like most guys are circumcised so I guess I just feel like I was ‘normal.'”

Straight Guy #2

“I wish I wasn’t,” Man #2 lamented. “Mostly because I’ve learned that uncircumcised men experience more pleasure. It took me until my mid-20s to learn about this, and I felt cheated out of a natural and beautiful part of my body by a decision that was never given to me.”

This really is just another light Cosmo piece that sidesteps the main issue, because I've seen more than one battle royal on social media over which is better, cut or uncut.

Frankly, if I had the choice I'd prefer uncut. But I think the main point is that men really don't get a choice in this matter. They cut it off before you even know you have it.  You can read the rest here.

Gay Marriage Six More States

The federal government has just recognized same sex marriage in six more states, meaning that federal benefits will be given to those couples.

 Attorney General Eric Holder says the states are: Alaska, Arizona, Idaho, North Carolina, West Virginia and Wyoming. Saturday's announcement brings the total number of states with federal recognition of same-sex marriage to 32, plus the District of Columbia. Couples married in these states will qualify for a range of federal benefits, including Social Security and veterans' benefits.

There's more here, with an explanation about more states.  It's not the most in-depth piece, but I think the general idea is important to most people.

Genderqueer Identification

I'm posting about this because I think a lot of people out there don't really know what it means when someone says they are genderqueer and self-identify as such. It's an interesting article because it states basically what I'm always harping about here on the blog...that you can't fit all LGBTI people into one neat little category and be done with it. In other words, it goes way deeper than what you see on Modern Family. And these people are speaking up about it now. Think of it as another layer, and never assume anything.

"A person whose gender identity is neither man nor woman, is between or beyond genders, or is some combination of genders. This identity is usually related to or in reaction to the social construction of gender, gender stereotypes and the gender binary system. Some genderqueer people identify under the transgender umbrella while others do not."

The article goes on to discuss how they are making a point to make people conscious about this through social media and the Internet...probably because it's NOT going to happen in mainstream news.

I think by now everyone knows I'm not fond of being called queer...the word bothers me. I despise it. I've posted about that often and I'm not getting into it again. But I also don't mind those who want to be called queer. I get it and I'm fine with it. If anything that one factor alone speaks loudly about the many different parts that make up the LGBTI community.

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

.99 Gay E-book


Saturday, October 25, 2014

Is Batman Gay? Gay Jesus; Nick Jonas on Bulges; 25 Awesome Moments American Horror Story

Is Batman Gay?

Do we really care? I'm not sure we'll ever know for certain, however, this article discusses the topic, in short. I'm not into comics, so I'll quote more than explain on this one.

Multiversity: The Just #1, by Grant Morrison and Ben Oliver, was released on October 22 and is set in a world where superheroes have become obsolete (sounds a bit boring). Rather than saving the world from evil villains, Batman and Superman and the likes are treated more like celebrities, and where there are celebrities there are bratty children of celebrities.

Find out the rest here, where there's also a link to another piece on the topic about the overall "gay" interpretation of the batman series. That part is actually interesting.

Gay Jesus

I can only imagine the backlash this piece is going to receive, and I think it might be justified to a certain extent this time. I'm not very religious at all, however, I also don't like to judge things like this because it's art and it's subjective. I owned an art gallery for many years in New Hope, PA, and the most consistent thing I learned is that art is something you have to feel passionate about. I don't feel that way about this particular art, but others do.

They give an explanation that almost sounds plausible, but to me it looks like click-bait designed to give attention to people who otherwise normally wouldn't get it. In any event...

“A queer Passion is crucial now even for non-believers because Christianity is being used to justify discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people,” Cherry, a minister and art historian, says in a press release. “The book speaks not only to the LGBT community, but to everyone who is passionate about building a more just world.”

The rest is here. I'm just not into it. But I do think this shows how different the gay community can be.

The comments are candid.

However, there's a more aggressive article over here. This time they're claiming Facebook discriminated against them and censored them because of sexual orientation. The comments with this link are even more interesting.

Nick Jonas on Bulges

Now this, I think, is almost funny because it's so transparent. Gay baiting Nick Jonas who always seems to be the cute little straight guy pandering to gay men is at it again. (If you notice I rarely post anything about Nick Jonas for very concise reasons. I don't like gay baiting.)  But can we really blame Jonas? This article is in a gay publication. They didn't have to publish it.

Jonas, currently starring as a possibly gay man in the DirecTV series The Kingdom, also offered a quick tutorial on filming sex scenes. Fun was had by all.

In a video at this link, Jonas plays a game that deals with guessing male celebrity bulges.

And, once again, the comments are more interesting than the article. I would be remiss if I didn't post this one because it makes me wonder if gay men are finally getting sick and tired of this kind of thing.

That’s what I’m trying to figure out. And this Jonas kid REALLY needs to stop with the desperate pandering to gays. He’s trying way too hard. Sorry, he can take his shirt off and play little dumb cutesie games like this and I’m still not buying his lousing music.

25 Awesome Moments American Horror Story

Here's a link to an article with 25 of the most fascinating moments on American Horror Story. I think it's the whole series combined...with all seasons.

Obviously we use the word “awesome” with quite a bit of leeway when discussing a show whose stocks-in-trade include disembodied racists, serial killing teen ghosts, and self-administered asylum abortions – but these 25 WTF American Horror Story moments kept us coming back to Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk‘s small-screen slaughterhouse season after season for more campy, blood-soaked thrills.

Here's where you can see them all. 

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

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Friday, October 24, 2014

Family Circle Gay Backlash; Davey Wavey on Safe Sex; Gay In Prison; Pat Robertson: Gay Rights Activists Terrorists

Family Circle Gay Backlash

Remember how I posted about Family Circle Magazine earlier this week, and how they did a feature with two gay dads in a new feature section? Well, there's been plenty of backlash from the anti-gays out there about that feature and it hasn't been pretty.

Women's magazine Family Circle just made history by featuring a gay family in its publication for the first time ever, but they were met with backlash from some hateful readers.

Same-sex couple Chris and Bob Osner-Hackett appear alongside their two daughters in the most recent issue of Family Circle in a new question-and-answer column titled "Modern Life."

Here's the link. You can read the comments from facebook, and the people who commented are listed by name. I'd rather not put that kind of thing here on the blog. I don't even like linking to it. In this case, as in most others, the hate is coming once again from the good old God-loving religious types.

Davey Wavey on Safe Sex

Sometimes I wonder if these things are meant to be serious or not. Common sense dictates the best way to talk about safe sex with a potential partner is to come out and say, "I only practice safe sex, like it or not." That's what always worked best for me. I'm really not joking about this. I have no complaints, and if anyone didn't like talking about it, or me stating this, I went home alone. I never buckled to peer pressure. I'm not trying to sound holier than thou either. I was a kid when AIDS started and I still remember the details all too well.

Evidently, Davey Wavey has a few tips on how to bring up the topic of safe sex in a more casual way. I honestly didn't even think something like this could be an issue. But I guess it is and at least someone is discussing it in a way that makes sense to those of you who are embarrassed.

For many guys, simply asking, “Hey do you have a condom?” does the trick — it’s direct, lets him know you’re on board to get down, and sends the message that safe sex is a priority for you. If he responds, “Uhh…no, but it’s cool,” then you know you have a problem.

My only comment is that you should never be embarrassed to say you practice safe sex, not with anyone. And never trust anyone who tells you it doesn't matter to him.

You can read the rest here.

Gay In Prison

I personally have no doubts about this one...that it sucks to be gay in prison. I can't even imagine what it would be like. And this article makes some very interesting points.

15 former and current inmates at San Bernardino Prison in California filed a class action lawsuit alleging mistreatment and discrimination because they're gay and bi.

The lawsuit says that the, “inmates are not given equal access to opportunities to reduce their sentences, services, programs and facilities, and are often treated in an abusive and neglectful manner. In short, GBT inmates at WVDC serve longer sentences and endure substantially worse conditions of confinement simply because they are gay, bisexual or transgender.
Unlike the male, non-GBT general population, sentenced GBT inmates at WVDC are generally not allowed to participate in the inmate work program, and, to the extent they may occasionally have limited access, it is substantially less than that available to non-GBT inmates.”
You can read more here. The rest is as disturbing.

Pat Robertson: Gay Rights Activists Terrorists

When I posted about Anderson Cooper responding to something Pat Robertson said about the AIDS virus, yesterday, I didn't know the discussion would continue. But now it seems Pat Robertson is calling gay activists terrorists.

“These people are terrorists, they're radicals, and they're extremists,” Robertson told "700 Club" viewers. “No Christian in his right mind would ever try to enforce somebody against their belief or else suffer jail. Now they did that during the Inquisition. It was horrible. It was a black mark on our history, but it isn't being done now. There's no Christian group I know of anywhere in the world that would force somebody to do something contrary to their deep-held religious beliefs or else face criminal penalties, but that's what the homosexuals are trying to do here in America and I think it's time pastors stand up and fight this monstrous thing."

It's hard for me to comment on this one because I'm not an activist. I just believe in good old fashioned civil rights and equality for all. But aside from everything else in this article, you'd think Robertson would at least get it right in a technical sense when he makes claims that AIDS can be spread through towels (his comment is in the link below), because it's getting harder to take the man seriously.

You can read the rest here.    

Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

.99 Gay E-book

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Anderson Cooper on AIDS; Is Michael Sam Done? Are Gay Men Mean to Each Other?

Anderson Cooper on AIDS

The thing I find most interesting about this article is that for once an openly gay men who has a highly respected position and who has nothing to hide from anyone is challenging someone like Pat Robertson with facts about AIDS. In the past, we haven't had anyone who has been able to do this for us. It makes me feel more validated for some reason.  You just can't fake certain things.

It seems Pat Robertson, the good Christian evangelist, has been telling his followers they can get AIDS by passing a towel. Cooper made it clear that's not how AIDS is passed, with this:

“Just to be clear, if, like Pat Robertson, you somehow missed all the evidence, all the research, the depth and breadth of all the knowledge garnered about HIV and AIDS over the past three decades, you cannot get HIV if you share towels,” Cooper said.

Just beware of visiting San Francisco, Cooper cautions. “Because that’s of course where all the gay people live and Pat Robertson thinks they have an ingenious way of giving you ‘the stuff.'”

In fact, most doctors will agree it's not easy to get AIDS because the way it's spread is so specific. In one case, I personally heard a doctor say this. I think most of my readers know how that works. If you don't, there's plenty of information out there with a simple search, and trust me you're not going to find any scientific data the proves AIDS can be spread through sharing a towel. And if you think that's how it's spread you have more problems than worrying about AIDS.

The rest is here.

Is Michael Sam Done?

Yesterday I posted about Michael Sam getting cut from the Cowboys, and I also mentioned I couldn't find much information about the story anywhere. Not surprising. Those good old boys don't want to touch this one with that proverbial ten foot pole.

However, today I found this story, and it's not very encouraging. And I don't think it's fair. I know it's a huge disappointment to see what's been happening to Sam (it gutted me for a moment), but I still think he's going to be picked up by someone eventually.

Well we’re sorry to report he did not make the team, after all. After spending the first seven weeks of the season on the Cowboy’s 10-man practice squad, they’ve decided to drop him to make way for linebacker Troy Davis, a second-year pro from Central Florida.

On the bright side, now he’s free to explore reality television with Oprah again. Assuming, of course, she’ll still take his call.

My prediction is that Sam will get picked up by another team. I think this article does him an injustice as a gay man who has inspired so many younger gay men...and gay men of all ages. I understand the disappointment because I felt it, too, but I don't believe for a moment we've heard the last of Michael Sam. I also think we'll be seeing more NFL players come out of the closet and tell the world they're gay. You think Michael Sam is the only one? If you do, you probably think AIDS can be spread with towels. 

You can read the rest here. The comments all agree with me. I think we'll be hearing more about Sam in the future.

Are Gay Men Mean to Each Other?

I'm honestly not sure gay men are any meaner to each other than straight men are with other straight men, or women are with other women. Have you ever seen two nasty straight men in a competitive situation? It's not pretty.

The fact is that for some reason there's always a little peer pressure or competition between the same groups of people and that's not going to change any time soon. It even happens in various professions. Doctors are often competitive and mean to other doctors. Actors can be mean to each other. And, trust me, you have NOT lived until you've watched two vicious, vituperative, competitive authors entertain you with their vitriol online.

It is what it is. I think gay men get more attention because it can be entertaining at times in a campy way. I think I've even admitted here on the blog that I often get along much better with straight men because there's no underlying competition. The dynamics make it easier. I have many gay friends, don't get me wrong. But there are some gay men in this world that make my skin crawl. I don't think that's mean. I think that's normal. And this article discusses the topic with Jimmy Fowlie’s Californian web series Go-go Boy Interrupted,which I haven't seen yet myself.

Commenters are unafraid to voice their often extreme opinions (about this show and literally everything else on the planet), which is the subject of episode three, out today.

Watch as disgraced go-go boy Danny Carter tries to cope with the bad press, and as always, feel free to chime in below.

This you can check out here.  There's also a video.

Here's just one comment that discusses the topic, plus it gets into Internet anonymity...verbatim:

there will always be the anonymous gay cowards who use internet anonymity to impotently vent their hatred, their insecurity, their jealousy….and who are their targets? usually it’s the openly-gay men who are living their own lives on their own terms – and basically being “the type of gays” that the Anonymous Haters need to “not be” in order to be barely-tolerated by the bigoted heterosexuals in their lives.

yup – it’s internalized homophobia, it’s bitterness, it’s jealousy, and it’s the anger that others are out there living their lives why they have only internet anonymity as their outlet.

I'm always on the fence with Internet anonymity. On the one hand I believe in it and I allow anon comments here on the blog, however, I moderate those anon comments constantly because as much as I believe in free speech I don't believe people can be trusted with the honor system. That's human nature, too. And some people are just plain, downright, rotten to the core.When you give them an open forum where they can comment anonymously they'll always ruin it for everyone else by saying things they normally would never say with their real names. A scorpion will always sting, but if you know this you might be able to swat it dead before you get stung.

                                                  Ring My Bells by Ryan Field
.99 Gay E-book

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Gay Family Circle; Michael Sam Cut From Cowboys; Downton Abbey Gay Cure; Ariana Grande On Catholicism and Gay Brother Frankie

Gay Family Circle

I received one of those magazine gifts last year for Family Circle Magazine and my first thought was OMG, now I have this to throw away, too. Although I still get several print magazines, the only one I order myself is Architectural Digest and I wind up throwing the rest away. I get my news...and I also never see anything LGBT related in mainstream publications and the content doesn't interest me. Plus, the last thing I need in my life is more clutter from print magazines.

However, as I was glancing through the most recent issue of FC, I noticed a feature story with two gay men...married with two children. The piece is in a new section of FC, titled "Modern Life," with a caption on the first page that reads, "Our biggest challenge? Finding time to sit down to dinner together!" There's a photo of two perfect gay dads, with their two perfect kids, that could have been a photo of Ozzie and Harriet 60 years ago.

I can't find an online link to the magazine, but I did find this piece about the new "Modern Life" section in FC.

A new “Modern Life” feature, which highlights nontraditional families, marks perhaps the biggest leap forward for the magazine’s content. “I didn’t think we were doing the best job of addressing all the different types of families,” admitted Fears. “We thought shows like Modern Family were actually doing a better job.”

Ironically, last night I was catching up with the TV show, Modern Family, on demand. I'm still not a huge fan of the show in a general sense, but I can't say that I don't find it interesting to see how they continue to mainstream gay people into society. I don't talk much about assimilation here on the blog, and that's mainly because I don't think it's possible to avoid this kind of assimilation anymore. With the equality we've been fighting for all this time there comes a price, and with that price comes changes in gay culture as we've always known it. In other words, you're not going to see or hear anything about drag shows, prison parties, Sunday afternoon tea dance, or anything even remotely related to gay culture on TV shows like MF or in magazines like FC.

And I think many gay people crave this heteronormative lifestyle. So why shouldn't FC put up a stupid, ridiculous feature with two gay dads the same way the do with hetero people? They've been doing this for years with hetero people and making fools out of them. It's only fair we get our turn now.

You can read more here about Family Circle, if you find that sort of thing interesting. 

 Michael Sam Cut From Cowboys

This one bothers me. The Dallas Cowboys cut openly gay pro football player, Michael Sam from the practice team, after being there since 9/3 and never making the 53- man roster. Previously, he was cut from the SL Rams.

 'Sam, the first openly-gay player in the NFL, was a seventh-round draft pick of the Rams,' the statement continued. 'He spent all of the offseason and training camp with the St. Louis before being released and signed to the Cowboys’ practice squad.' 

The team noted the spot will be filled by linebacker Troy Davis, a second-year professional. 

Sam used Twitter to thank the team. 'I want to thank the Jones family and the entire Cowboys organization for this opportunity, as well as my friends, family, teammates, and fans for their support,' he wrote

You can read more here. Sam goes on to make a gracious comment, without a hint of bitterness. He plans to continue his career as a pro player.

There's not much more about this story yet, and it seems as though no one wants to even touch the subject. I wonder why. Maybe they should all start reading Family Circle's "Modern Life" section of at the NFL.

Downton Abbey Gay Cure

One of the things I enjoy most about historical shows like Downton Abbey is the way we can reflect on the idiocy that was supposed to be correct back in those days. I was watching The Knick last night and the cure for a drug addiction was giving the addict heroin. I'm not joking about that. And in the upcoming season of DA the gay character, Thomas Barrow, is supposedly going to get injections that will cure him from being attracted to men. The word gay wasn't used until the 1970's and I hate using it in reference to same sex situations prior to that.

Julian Fellowes said in an interview with ITV, 'He falls for the quackery that this can be cured, that he can get rid of this dumbbell he is dragging around with him. His fortitude takes him through a period of incredible physical discomfort.' 

'The result he seeks is impossible – it’s not to be obtained by any medical treatment, it was just quackery.'

Unfortunately, there are still quacks out there who believe gays can be cured.

You can check out the rest here.  

 Ariana Grande On Catholicism and Gay Brother Frankie

Pop singer, Ariana Grande, disclosed that she renounced her Catholic roots in support of her openly gay brother, Frankie Grande. For those who don't know, Frankie is a talented performer who was recently on Big Brother this past summer. I can't recall the name of the play, but he just landed a new gig on Broadway.

 'When my brother was told that God didn’t love him I was like, "OK, that’s not cool,"' she said in an interview with Sunday Telegraph magazine. 

'They were building a Kabbalah center in Florida so we both checked it out and really had a connection with it.' 

She said since renouncing Catholicism for Kabbalah, her life has changed for the better.

Although no one in our families has done anything similar, Tony and I are non-practicing Catholics for the same reasons Ariana left the church. If we ever decided to adopt a child I would want him/her to grow up with some kind of religion, but it wouldn't be Catholicism. I know most practicing Catholics do support gays, and I even know a few priests who do, too. But the big picture is more important in a case like this.

One thing is certain, you never have to wonder why the Catholic church seems to be losing people as each year passes.

You can read the rest here.

 Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

.99 Gay E-book

'Sam, the first openly-gay player in the NFL, was a seventh-round draft pick of the Rams,' the statement continued. 'He spent all of the offseason and training camp with the St. Louis before being released and signed to the Cowboys’ practice squad.'
The team noted the spot will be filled by linebacker Troy Davis, a second-year professional.
- See more at:

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

The Big Gay Love Story: Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

The Big Gay Love Story: Ring My Bells by Ryan Field

I have a new release out today titled, Ring My Bells. The Big Gay Love Story part is something I may continue with all future stories as a subtitle. And this is a story. It's not a full length novel. I'm hoping all the product descriptions are clear on retail web sites where e-books are sold so no one gets confused. It's also priced at .99, which I'm trying to continue for as long as I can.

Here the link for And I'll post more links as I get them. 

Here's the blurb:

When the phone goes dead and a handsome young gay man with serious needs can't figure out how to fix it, he calls a repairman to get the job done. But the young man soon discovers the broken phone isn't the only thing the big strong repairman is eager to work on, and he's glad he answered the door without his shirt. It may not be true love at first sight, or the kind of story that will make a person weep with those unyielding, proverbial floods of emotion. But it is the kind of sexy, cheeky, happily-ever-after gay ending that might make a few people smile on a cold winter's night.

I think I made it clear in the blurb this isn't a romance in the traditional m/m sense. But I also want to make it clear there is a happy ending and it's one of my lighter stories that run more along the lines of traditional gay erotic fiction, with respect to gay culture. In other words, it's a sexy little story about real gay guys.

Here's an excerpt, and please remember this part of the post is fiction (smile):

About a year ago the telephone wasn't working. I keep a landline because cell phones still don't get great signals around here. There was no dial tone at all that morning; just a soft beep sound when I pressed the talk button, and the small screen lighting up pale green for a couple of seconds.
There had been severe thunderstorms the night before, but the electricity hadn't gone out and there didn't seem to be any lines down on the property. Maybe it just had to be re-set, I thought. Unplug the cord and plug it back in a half hour later. I remembered that had happened once before, after I'd left the phone off the hook for a while.

After leaving it unplugged for a half hour, it still wasn't working when I re-set it. So with the telephone in my hand, I went down to the basement to see if everything was connected correctly. Attached to wooden beams, I found red, blue, white and black wires all screwed tightly to where they should be screwed. Everything seemed fine. And then I noticed a phone line going to the burglar alarm system, with phone jack at the base of a one square foot, locked metal box. I hesitantly unplugged the phone cord from the alarm box (I hate to touch things I don't understand), pushed the talk button on the phone and I immediately had a dial tone. The problem, evidently, was with the alarm system; not the telephone.

It only took one phone call to the alarm company for them to tell me they knew the problem well and they'd send someone out to fix it that day. A surge protector, so they said, had burned out during the severe thunderstorms. Not a big deal was how they'd put it, and as long as I didn't plug the phone back into the alarm it would work perfectly normal. The same thing had happened to several other homes in my area, so they'd said.

This all happened very early in the morning, before I'd had time for my ritual workout routine. Though I work at home for the most part, I'm usually up at five thirty or six every day so I can cram an hour workout into the day with weights and cardio. I'm usually dressed, showered and shaved by eight and seated in front of the computer no later than eight-thirty. I'd assumed the alarm guy wouldn't show up until sometime that afternoon; they usually make you wait all day. So I ran a half hour on the treadmill and then did another half hour with free weights. This routine was strenuous, and often dull, but the workouts kept my waist at size thirty, my chest popping at forty-two inches, and my ass hard and firm. The small of my back, which is deeply curved (more so when I arch my back on purpose), is what guys always said they liked most about my body. At twenty-five years old, I like to think that what I do now as exercise will benefit me in the future when things begin change with age.

That's also the ironic part about me: I don't have issues with age. I'm usually more attracted to men with silver in their hair, a few lines on their faces, and mature looks. I've been known to go down on my knees for men who have slight middle age paunches. I think men reach their sexiest point around age forty and it keeps getting better as they approach their late fifties. Why I once jumped in between a couple of men in their sixties just to see what it would be like for both of them to fuck me. And those two horse hung daddies fucked me so long and so hard they left bruises on the backs of my legs and I walked with a slight limp for the next twenty-four hours.

I'm not sure why, but if there is a good looking guy in his twenties or thirties in the room, and a good looking guy in his forties or fifties in the same room, I go out of my way to make eye contact with the older instead of the younger. And it's always been that way, ever since I was three years old and I used to sit on Uncle Joe's lap. He was a neighbor, and not related to me, so there was nothing pervy going on there. He would bounce me up and down, innocently, thinking nothing of it. And I would get a thrill deep in my body I couldn't explain at the time. When I kissed him hello or good-bye, I made sure I rubbed my cheek against his rough beard on purpose.

James Franco Allegedly Attacks Photographer; Obama on Gay Marriage; Robert Downey Jr's Penis

James Franco Allegedly Attacks Photographer

Here's more on James Franco again, and I'm a little surprised because he always seems so calculated and in control...cunning in a brilliant way, as if you have to watch his every move and be a few steps ahead.

Allegedly, Franco was at an event in Hollywood that was being held in some graveyard and on his way out he tackled a photographer on the grass. There are photos circulating that show Franco smiling as if it's all a joke. I searched a few "reputable" sources online, about as reputable as you can get online these days, and found this.

The cameraman, however, is not the least bit amused even if the tackling was supposed to be all in good fun. He went down to a LAPD station the following morning, at which time he filed a report against the actor for what he had done. The report details the man’s claims that he had been injured following his fall, suffering a minor injury to his back based on the way he had fallen. He also alleges that his camera equipment had been damaged during the incident, and is no longer usable in the same manner thanks to Franco’s actions. Police authorities have since given the statement to popular gossip website TMZ that they plan on passing the case onto the appropriate detectives as of next week, who will do their best to inquire further into the situation and see if amends need to be made on the Franco’s part.

You can read more here. Several other articles out there mention a few other incidents Franco has had with the law. And this one goes on to mention another privileged celebrity and his incident with a photographer.

Obama on Gay Marriage

Whether you like President Obama or not, one thing remains certain: he's good with the social issues that most politicians just tend to ignore. And anything gay related is up there in the top ten of the issue ignoring list. This time the President recently commented on gay marriage, and how he believes it should be legal in all 50 states according to the constitution. 

He described it as a 'consequential and powerful signal of the changes that have taken place in society and that the law is having to catch up'. 
Obama, who first said he 'evolved' on gay marriage in May 2012, said the high court was 'not quite ready' to 'indicate an equal-protection right across the board'. 
'Ultimately, I think the Equal Protection Clause does guarantee same-sex marriage in all 50 states,' he said.

It seems, as gay marriage moves forward in all 50 states, it's coming down to religion vs civil rights. I think anyone running for office these days should pay attention and listen closely. The gay vote doesn't always go in the same direction, especially not with younger gay men.

Robert Downey Jr's Penis

Try to imagine this. An actor, Robert Downey Jr., is invited to speak at a prestigious university, Cambridge, to a highly select group at the university, and one of those students of the entitlement generation ask Downey how large his penis is. And better, the rest of them laugh and giggle. I have a sense of humor that goes beyond most people these days, and I'm not fond of the PC police at all, but I do think there should be a certain amount of respect shown to any speaker in all situations like this...without question. 

In any event, Downey replied very well:

They don't call me throbbing knob for nothing. His expression is priceless. Someone else might have gone after the kid.

You can see a video of the reply here. If anyone had asked a woman this same question about her vagina it would have been blasted all over the Internet and social media as misogynist, anti-feminist, and hate speech toward all woman. Jennifer Lawrence would never let you hear the end of it. Shouldn't it work the same way for men in similar awkward positions?

Too Hard to Handle

by Ryan Field
Speaking to The New Yorker, Obama said the best Supreme Court decisions since he took office was the recent rejection of gay marriage appeals from five states.
He described it as a 'consequential and powerful signal of the changes that have taken place in society and that the law is having to catch up'.
Obama, who first said he 'evolved' on gay marriage in May 2012, said the high court was 'not quite ready' to 'indicate an equal-protection right across the board'.
'Ultimately, I think the Equal Protection Clause does guarantee same-sex marriage in all 50 states,' he said.
- See more at:

Monday, October 20, 2014

Twisty the Clown on American Horror Story; A Mom's Letter of Gay Remorse; Neil Patrick Harris on Being Gay

Twisty the Clown on American Horror Story

Even I have to admit that Ryan Murphy outdid himself this year with the theme of American Horror Story: Freak Show. The freak show appeal not only captures the end of an era in the US, but also proves the subject still has the ability to capture the overactive imaginations of people today. And one of the most interesting characters is the clown, and that's hard to top because all of the characters lend something fascinating to the show whether it comes in the form of high camp or it's deeply emotional.

In any event, John Carroll Lynch plays Twisty the Clown on AHSFS and he gave an interview recently to help explain what's happening.

Ryan Murphy had said that some of the crew had to leave the set at times because you were so scary.
There were many evenings where I was standing kind of apart from them -- as you see in the first two episodes; Twisty lives a solitary life. There were times I’d be sitting on the set and I would creep people out. In the first episode, where all of the people in the Freak Show are dismantling the body of the detective, I was standing apart as I was in the shot. Afterward I walked by and everyone was like, “Man, you’re really freaky over there.” I love that fact that people are dismantling a body on one side of the screen and then [people tell me] “I’m scared of you.” [Laughs.]

Do you think it’s mostly your costume that’s so freaky, or are you in full character the whole time on set?
I think a lot of it has to do with people’s general fear of clowns and fear of people in masks. But I also think it’s this kind of kooky discomfort around this person where you don’t know what his agenda is.

You can check out the rest of the interview here. Frankly, and this is no reflection on the show because I'm loving it, I don't get the fear of clown thing. Clowns never bothered me, not Twisty or any other clown. I love them. I'd be more frightened of a fictional character named Twisty the Vagina. But this clown is scaring the hell out of everyone else.

A Gay Mom's Letter of Remorse

There was an article recently about a mom's experience when she learned her son was gay. In short, the family of the gay son decided to make him choose between Jesus and being gay. It's a very hard story to read, because the more the gay son tried to change the worse his life became and he ultimately died. After the story was published the mom received tons of letters slamming her and criticizing what she did, and with good reason. Now the mom has published an open letter to the people who've been criticizing her.

From the original article that sparked all the negative reactions:

Now, when I think back on the fear that governed all my reactions during those first six years after Ryan told us he was gay, I cringe as I realize how foolish I was. I was afraid of all the wrong things. And I grieve, not only for my oldest son, whom I will miss every day for the rest of my life, but for the mistakes I made. I grieve for what could have been, had we been walking by faith instead of by fear. Now, whenever Rob and I join our gay friends for an evening, I think about how much I would love to be visiting with Ryan and his partner over dinner. But instead, we visit Ryan's gravestone.

This is from the latest open letter she wrote to explain how she really feels:

Our much-loved eldest son and dear friend Ryan is dead -- a fact that I daily try to get my brain wrapped around -- and if you have ever had a child and lost them, you know that the pain of losing a child never leaves you. Never. We will live with intense sorrow over his death until our own deaths, and right now that sounds like a very, very long time. 

When we weep and mourn, we don't question God or wonder why He allowed our son to die. We don't have questions for God that complicate our grief; we only have questions and accusations of ourselves. The tapestry of our grief is woven through with threads of remorse, regret and self-reproach.

It's a sad story that's repeated all the time...even to a certain extent in my own life. I never met Tony's mom. She passed in 2002 before I had the chance and we were already together for ten years. At the time, my family didn't know Tony either. In my case it was kind of a don't as don't tell thing. However, I made a point to change that the same year Tony's mom passed. And we got together with my mom and dad for dinner about a month later. This past summer, twelve years later, my mom spent six weeks with us recuperating from cancer surgery and Tony helped take care of her as if she as his own mother. It was six wonderful weeks of quality time I wouldn't exchange for anything in the world. We've had many dinners together.

Neil Patrick Harris on Being Gay

Neil Patrick Harris has a new autobiography out and there have been a few things mentioned in the press about the content. For one thing, he first knew he was gay when he developed a crush on a trumpet player in middle school in l986. For another, he mentions a kissing incident with Burt Reynolds.

'As a joke at the end of one take, Burt leans over and kisses you square on the mouth,' he writes.
'The crew thinks this is very funny, but it makes you uncomfortable. Uncomfortable and, it will ultimately turn out, gay. Burt Reynolds' kiss makes you gay.'
- See more at:
But while appearing on BL Stryker did something happen that changed everything. 

'As a joke at the end of one take, Burt leans over and kisses you square on the mouth,' he writes. 

'The crew thinks this is very funny, but it makes you uncomfortable. Uncomfortable and, it will ultimately turn out, gay. Burt Reynolds' kiss makes you gay.' 

For those who have never seen this, here's a photo of Burt Reynolds, nude.

Now, if that sexy, fuzzy image of Burt Reynolds is not every little gay boy's dream come true I don't know what else is.

You can read more about Harris here, and I'm starting to think the book looks interesting. The problem these days is that it's a book I would have lunged at five or ten years ago just out of pop culture curiosity, but I have so much reading right now and so many other choices I'm not even sure I have time. Plus, the kindle version is 10.99, which means sorry Randon House but not until you drop that price a little.

But if you are curious about coming out, and you don't have anyone to talk to, I think this would be a great book to read in digital form on your phone, in private. Even if they are raking you over the proverbial coals a little with the ridiculous price of the e-book. Books like this usually help make the coming out experience easier when you see that you're not the only one.

Too Hard to Handle

by Ryan Field