Margaret Cho's Fashion Police Salary; Jonathan Groff Working It On Broadway; Liverpool's Gay District Going Wizard of Oz

Margaret Cho's Fashion Police Salary

Ever since Joan Rivers passed away I've been following what's been happening with Fashion Police and I haven't always been thrilled. I'm not a Kathy Griffin fan and when she finally left FP and Tweeted about leaving with all that unnecessary drama, I thought there was a lot of hope left for the show...with Griffin gone.

The changes seem to be working, the show is fresh again, and Margaret Cho was a great addition. But Cho wants to set the record straight, so to speak, about her salary.

‘I am not making six figures!’ Cho wrote in a Facebook post. ‘I will earn about $5000 per episode, which isn’t actually very much for me, yet I am proud to make that much because I love to spend time with (writers) Tony Tripoli, Teddy Margas Melissa Rivers, Giuliana Rancic and Brad Goreski.

‘We get up at the crack of dawn and honor our old friend Joan Rivers. We laugh and enjoy each other and remember the magical woman and mentor we have lost. I am grateful to be on the show and I would do it for free. Six figures would be nice though! Who gets that for anything? I don’t even know! Not me!’

The rest is here.

Jonathan Groff Working It On Broadway

No one can ever say Jonathan Groff doesn't work hard. He seems to be everywhere, including Broadway. He really does seem like the consummate actor who only cares about the art and the craft.  He's not posting selfies and he's not trying to outdo himself all over social media. He's only interested in acting. That's not easy to find anywhere these days...an actor who wants to act.

The multi-talented star of stage and screen is currently playing the role of King George III in the smash Broadway musical Hamilton.

‘It’s like a drug coming out there every night,’ Groff told Charlie Rose this week. ‘It’s so amazing to be breathing in the air of the Hamilton experience. That alone is so incredibly special and something I’ll never forget.’

He provides the comic relief during a mere nine minutes of stage time.

‘It’s delicious writing. I love saying it every night,’ Groff says. ‘Before I joined the show,. I knew it was nine minutes of show time. I have not gotten sick of (of it). I’ve done it over 100 times.

 There's more here with a huge close up of Groff. If I were an actor I'd do something like that for free just to get the experience.

Liverpool's Gay District Going Wizard of Oz

I guess they know they don't have to do this in Liverpool. Wizard of Oz fandom and being gay is not always one in the same. In other words, there are a lot of gay men out there who have seen The Wizard of Oz once and that was enough. The streets where they live don't have to resemble The Wizard of Oz.

Maybe they're going for  high camp in Liverpool with this makeover? I'm not sure.


Stanley Street Quarter, the ‘official LGBT Quarter’ for the northern England city of Liverpool has announced that Eberle Street is to be given a major makeover inspired by the classic film, The Wizard of Oz.

Whereas the gay scenes in other cities are facing tough times, the city of Liverpool is spending £1.4million ($2.1m/€1.9m) on a program to improve the walking connections between the Commercial District and the retail core of the city center.

The article linked to in the above quote is interesting because I've posted about that before. Its a piece on how difficult it's becoming to own and operate exclusively gay businesses...and how many gay clubs have shuttered in the UK.

I don't live in Liverpool so it's not something I care all that much about. However, if my township did something like that to my street I would move. I spend a good deal of my life getting slapped in the face with the old gay stereotypes...almost daily...and I don't feel the need to support them anymore.

You can check the rest out here.  

The Rainbow Detective Series

Saying Goodbye

Amazon Link

Beware the Gay Dentist? Montgomery Clift Gay Movie and Matt Bomer; Kathy Griffin on Joan Rivers

Beware the Gay Dentist?

This link actually reminds me of something that happened to a friend of mine. In the 90's a friend of mine was a dentist in Philadelphia. He lived full time in New Hope and commuted. Without going into a long story, someone spread a rumor that he had AIDS and his dental practice fell to pieces. He eventually had to stop practicing dentistry and he sued the person who spread the rumor for defamation. He wound up with a good seven figure settlement...but at what cost? He didn't practice again for many years, and not until he moved to Palm Springs and became certified there. It took about three thousand miles to remove the stigma, and, he was NOT even HIV positive. All rumor.

So this news that's happening in Italy doesn't surprise me too much:

An Italian dentist is the victim of a leaflet campaign, informing his patients to be wary of him because he is gay. 

Alessandro Bordoni, a gay rights activist based in Tuscany, has said they do not know who made up the 'health warning' notices but they plan on finding out. 

'Notice to patients,' reads one of the leaflets, 'a gay dentist works here, you are kindly asked to be careful and take the due precautions'. 

You know what the underlying statement is there. Here's the rest.

I hope they find out who started this.

Montgomery Clift Gay Movie and Matt Bomer

HBO is taking the initiative to produce a film about the old film star, Montgomery Clift. He was a huge sensation in the 50's, starring in some of the most classic films of that era, and was also one of the most tortured closeted gay men in the history of film.

The project began as an independent film but now has the corporate muscle of HBO behind it to bring it to fruition. The pay cable channel also brought the gay-themed Behind the Candelabra and The Normal Heart to the screen in recent years. 

Deadline Hollywood reports that HBO has brought in The Love Is Strange duo of Ira Sachs and Mauricio Zacharias to rewrite a script by Christopher Lovick and Larry Moss is attached to direct. 

Clift was a closeted gay man who struggled with his sexuality and what impact it would have on his career as a leading man. 

You can read more here. There's irony and justice with this one. I doubt Clift would ever have imagined that so many years later an openly gay actor who is actually getting parts in Hollywood and has a huge fanbase would be playing lead in his life story. The article goes on to talk about how this is changing in Hollywood...but not quite as fast as I think it should be changing. I think the list of closeted gay stars in Hollywood continues even now. And in some cases I actually don't blame them.

Kathy Griffin on Joan Rivers

It's no surprise Kathy Griffin will be taking over for Joan Rivers on Fashion Police. TV is notorious for making bad choices like this. Look at who CNN replaced Larry King with. I guess in an attempt to prove herself Griffin is commenting now on how she'll be different.

The comic told The Today Show this week that she will be similar to her mentor with her outspoken nature but will also have her own style. 'I will continue, if nothing else, in her fearless style of taking no prisoners,' she said. 

'But our styles were different. I’m a different human being, I’m more improvisational and I don’t know what I’m going to say and neither does anyone else on the panel.'

I'm not the best one to comment on this because I was a Joan Rivers fan, and because Kathy Griffin's politics turned me off on her a long time ago. In fact, there's nothing about Kathy Griffin I find funny except her face, hair, and make up. She reminds me of Ruth Buzzi without the bun, hairnet and Eleanor Roosevelt shoes...but trying to  quasi chic at the same time. And I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would let someone with no fashion sense comment about fashion and expect to be taken seriously.

But it is what it is and I could be in the minority. I hope the show does well in spite of Griffin's lack of style and humor. Frankly, I think Joan Rivers had Griffin around for a reason and that reason had nothing to do with Griffin being strong competition. Joan Rivers was a smart woman...because you can't be funny and dumb. 

You can read the rest here. 

Fangsters

Amazon Link

 

 

James Franco's Orals; Doubdickdude's Video; President Obama on Joan Rivers

James Franco's Orals

Sorry, this isn't about James Franco and Gay oral sex. I wish it were, but it's not. But he would have taken advantage of that title so I figured why not do it myself.

The title is not completely misleading. James Franco did do orals this week, at Yale University. I don't have any links to give because the media seems to go dead when Franco actually does something that most people would think is worthy. Maybe there will be a few, but as of right now I didn't see anything.

But I did see this. It's a link to Franco's fracebook page where he's standing with a group of what I assume are professors, posting about passing his orals. It's one of his better images because it's real...no Beyoncé photo shopping deal there.

You see, this is the kind of thing that frustrates me most about Franco. He does five or six dumb things and gets all kind of attention for it...like shaving his head or getting a tattoo...and then he does something absolutely fantastic like this and he only promotes it on Facebook. I've done orals; they aren't easy.

Of course most of the comments on the status update are congratulatory, but some devolve into the smut you'd expect, mostly laced with gay slurs. But that's not Franco's fault. It is what it is.

Doubledickdude's Video

A while back I posted about a guy with two penises, Doubledickdude. He made headlines and seems to be popular on Twitter. I follow him on Twitter and today I saw this. Oddly enough, and I swear this happened by accident, the post I did previously on Doubledickdude also involved James Franco and an open letter by someone from the Village Voice.

And there's even an open letter in The Village Voice to James Franco about the guy with two penises.

Let's get through the superficial reasons first. This magical male unicorn (er, twonicorn?) is anonymous, which I estimate will last about another week. But here's what we know about him so far: he's sex-positive, brave, bisexual, and in a committed relationship with a man and a woman who've given him permission to cheat -- but only with you.

Well, I guess the author of THAT piece was wrong in one respect. Doubledickdude is still around, and a lot of people find him interesting. I do. But that piece was from the Village Voice and they used be a lot edgier than they are now. In fact, the Village Voice was once the Grindr of yesteryear in hard copy, where you could hook up with anyone for any kind of sex. I'm not sure if they still do that. But that's what it used to be.

But I digress. Here's Doubledickdude's video. It is SFW. I'm not posting it here because Youtube is having issues sharing today. But I think it's interesting.

President Obama on Joan Rivers

A while back I also posted about a joke Joan Rivers made about the President and First Lady, with gay references. I can't find the link now, but it was a gay joke that sent some PC elite liberals into a tailspin, and I commented on it at the time. In any event, President Obama seems to have understood Joan Rivers' comedy and her brand of wit. So much that he wrote a letter to Melissa Rivers after Joan's death, in condolence.

During the TV special tonight entitled, Fashion Police: Celebrating Joan, the comedy icon's daughter will read a handwritten letter she received from President Obama after her mother's death.

Says Rivers in a preview clip: 'I received a letter from the White House from President Obama, someone who was often a target of her jokes, as was Mrs. Obama.'

She then goes on to read from the letter: ‘Not only did she make us laugh, she made us think.’

 Rivers then shared her own observation: 'I think that's one of the things people now are realizing. It wasn't just the funny, she made us think.'

And that's really what it's all about.  You can read the rest here.

 

 

Books in the Glendora Hill Series

 

The Sheriff and the Outlaw

 

The Preacher's Husband

 

Cowboy Christmas Miracle

Spreading HIV On Purpose; More Grindr Crimes; Anderson Cooper on Joan Rivers; Smashwords Ryan Field

Spreading HIV On Purpose

A few weeks ago I posted about a gay man who found out from friends on social media that the guy he was in love with and hoping to marry had intentionally infected him with the HIV virus. You can read more about that here. This gem of a guy had allegedly been spreading HIV to others as well and brags about it on social media.

His name is Miguel Guerra, and he also goes by Ashton Chavez. In California where this happened it's considered a misdemeanor and a judge, in what sounds like a lame attempt to curb this guy's habits, recently ordered him to stop using online hook up sites, especially Grindr. It's also been alleged there are more victims to come forward. I guess the judge never heard of sockpuppets...or isn't familiar with the extent of deceit online everywhere these days.

San Diego Superior Court Judge Dan Link approved Deputy City Attorney Taylor Garrott's request that the judge orders Guerra to not use Internet dating sites as a condition of remaining free on bond after a request to increase bail from US$2,500 to US$50,000 was rejected.

You can read the rest of this article here. The comments are interesting, and slightly divided. My only comment is that if it can be proven Guerra intentionally infected other men with HIV, lock him up and throw away the key. You get charged with a misdemeanor for pissing on the sidewalk, not spreading a serious, life-changing illness.

I'm starting to think we need a new term for this sort of thing...like rape culture. Because in many respects HIV culture is a lot like it. The victim is blamed for having raw anal sex with someone who didn't use a condom, even if he's in a long term relationship with someone he thinks he can trust.

More Grindr Crimes

I also posted about this next article a few weeks ago, where two UK men lured and blackmailed unsuspecting men on Grindr. In fact, I've posted quite a bit about Grindr this year so far. You can find more with a simple search at the top of the blog.

In any event, the two creeps wound up getting four years in prison.

The victim had saved the money and drew it out from the bank to give to the men after they stayed all night in his home to ensure he paid up.

But when the other said he had no money, the two men told him he should crash his car into a store to get the cash - the victim was forced to go to the police.

You can read more here. The story is more involved, in the most frightening ways.

I wish I could be more encouraging about this, but I think that if you're going to screw around on Grindr you should hope for the best and always be ready for the worst.

Anderson Cooper on Joan Rivers

Anderson Cooper recently commented that he wasn't fond of Joan Rivers as a kid because she used his mom, Gloria Vanderbilt, as the focus of some of her most vicious jokes. You can't blame him. It was his mom.

But as he grew older he changed a few of his opinions:

'As an adult when I got to know her I came to actually like her and appreciate her,' Cooper said.

We're all thinking it. I know I am. What does Gloria Vanderbilt think about all this now? Elizabeth Taylor wasn't too thrilled with Joan Rivers' fat jokes, and Taylor spoke about that candidly after she lost a great deal of weight.  Here's one article that dates back to 1983:

But Taylor seemed intent on finally getting back at the acid-tongued comedienne. While her escort-of-the-moment, Mexican lawyer Victor Gonzalez Luna Jr., and 1,100 well-manicured guests looked on, Taylor rose from her dais seat, planted ringless (for once) hands on her ample hips and continued, "Because I was going to say Joan Rivers, if you're here, eat your hear-r-r-r-t out." Touched

You can read more about Cooper here.

Rivers often crossed the line, but many people laughed even more whenever she did that because it was always so true. Never a lie. The one thing I don't think anyone has mentioned so far since her death is that she was a brilliant woman. I'm not talking about comedy. I'm talking about her intellect, her knowledge. And I think the hardest part for her must have been these changing times where everyone's become so PC...or maybe it was easy for her? You make a joke or comment about a big fat ass anywhere nowadays and you're branded a hater for life. Or, you're destined to post images of fluffy kittens for the next four years.

RIP, Joan. Even though you pissed a lot of us off at times, you made most of us laugh.


Smashwords Ryan Field

Some may know, others may not know, but I have a full list of titles on Smashwords, from my indie published books priced at .99, to my e-books with publishers. The link below will take you to the Cage James page, which is  a recent release. Once there, there are links where you can check out the full list.

Cage James by Ryan Field

 

 

.99 E-Book

 

 

on

 

 

Smashwords

 

 



Gay Facebook Rant; Teaching Gayle King; Human Ken Doll; Joan Rivers' Career

Gay Facebook Rant

This is interesting for several reasons. A dad in the UK went on a Facebook rant and made threatening remarks about gays. Although he pleaded guilty he claims he's not homophobic and he just had a hard day at work.

In a post under an article about a Pride event in Newcastle, north England, he said:

 ‘If your parents were faggots, you horrible gay cunts wouldn't of [sic] been born! Should be lined up and machine gunned, vile disgusting cunts!’

 Gair posted another message that gay people should be ‘slaughtered’.

The chairman of Northern Pride was worried something more serious would happen. You can read more about it here.

I do think it's noteworthy to mention this happened on Facebook, on social media. I've seen posts like this in my time on Facebook and other social media where no one was even reprimanded. And it's not always about homophobia or gay hate. In fact, there was one woman author in m/m romance known to make vituperative threats, rants with the most obscene language, and she would bully other authors and readers to the point of despair. But that was back when the Internet was still young. I think we're moving toward more civilized times where these types of online issues won't be ignored any longer.

As for the dad who made these comments, I wonder what he considers homophobia. I hate to even think about it.

Teaching Gayle King

A while back I posted about Laverne Cox teaching Katie Couric a lesson. Katie Couric covered her tracks by calling it a "teachable" moment. I found that amusing. More recently, Cox found herself having to explain a few things to talk show host, Gayle King, of the Oprah camp. Cox made the point clear and concise without holding back.

Cox recently appeared on CBS This Morning where co-host Gayle King - also known as Oprah Winfrey's BFF - was stopped cold when she began the conversation this way: 'Let's let people know about you, Laverne, because you were born a boy but ... '

Cox stopped King short and said:

'I was assigned male at birth is the way I like to put it, because I think we're born who we are and the gender thing is something someone imposes on you. And so I was assigned male at birth but I always felt like I was a girl.'

This isn't the first time, and I don't think it will be the last time, when an overpaid TV host doesn't have a clue on this topic...or at least the basic sensitivity to tread lightly. The most interesting part is that it's not all that difficult to research even if you don't have a freaking clue, especially if you're getting paid what these people are getting paid. You never saw Barbara Walters do these things.

You can read more here.

Human Ken Doll

I find this interesting on so many levels I'm not sure where to begin. There's a guy, Justin Jedlica, who's had more than 150 cosmetic surgery procedures in a quest to become perfect and he's still working on it. I've had a couple of cosmetic surgery procedures and I know the pain involved. I can't even imagine going through 150.

"Ever since I was in my teens, I wanted to have plastic surgery. To me, it meant luxury and it meant wealth, and that was something I wanted in my life," he explains in the above video.

Jedlica says he got his first of five nose jobs shortly after his 18th birthday, costing him nearly all of his savings at $3,500. Afterwards, he experienced a sense of empowerment.

I know people laugh about this, but I can tell you first hand that there is a feeling of empowerment after a surgery like that. I had my nose done about twenty years ago and I really did feel very different afterward. Of course I only had it done once. I had a great doctor and I was thrilled with the results. But my point is that in most cases the psychological benefits from certain cosmetic surgery procedures far outweigh what the critics proclaim. And, I could breathe better, too.

You can read more here. The problem is that sometimes these things become addictions and that can be dangerous. They're also expensive and most insurance won't cover them.

Joan Rivers' Career

Speaking of plastic surgery, Joan Rivers has a new book out, and we've been seeing a lot more of her than usual. At one time I probably would have run out to buy her book, but now that I have access to so many different books I usually put books like this one on hold for a while...unless it's priced competitively.

In any event, Rivers gives an interview about what her life as a struggling woman in comedy was like back in the 1960's and I think it's interesting to hear some of her comments. Even though I haven't always been thrilled by the way Rivers treats gay men (like pet poodles), I have always admired her tenacity.

It's an interesting interview.

You can check that out here.

The Preacher's Husband

 

by Ryan Field

 

 

Amazon Link

 

 



"Turning" Gay for Orgasm? Joan Rivers Again; Gays Denied Swimming Pass; Small Town Romance Writer by Ryan Field

"Turning" Gay For Orgasm?

According to an anti-gay US pundit, Peter LaBarbera, men "turn" gay for cheap orgasms. In addition, LaBarbera has also accused the President of being obsessed with gays. LaBarbera has some kind of radio show somewhere on the fringes and he's been getting attention lately with David Manning, another homophobic minister with a TV show somewhere out there in oblivion, by attacking gays.

LaBarbera said he thinks homosexuals are not ‘real men’, because they cannot be bothered to date, marry and have children with a woman so instead they choose the easier gay life.

‘I think homosexuality is one sense offers to men, if I can say this on your program, it offers the cheap orgasm,’ he said.

‘It's a lot harder to be a man, a real man and have a family, court a woman, marry a woman, have children, raise a family.’

His comments are so painfully dumb I almost feel bad for him. He clearly knows nothing about gay men, because if he did he'd never makes statements like that. We court, we marry, and we do all the rest. And we've been doing all this long before same sex marriage became a topic. Even more interesting, many gay men who didn't come out of the closet for various social reasons actually did date women and all those other things LaBarbera mentions. In fact, I know several who are married and raising families right now...married to women. It's not all that uncommon.

There's more here.


Joan Rivers Again

I'm actually posting about Joan Rivers again because I think she's a master at getting attention and promotion. I respect her and admire her for many reasons. I love her wit and humor. I'm not always sure her way is the best way to go about it. But I think it's interesting that she's become so vocal lately on such hot topics right around the same time she has a brand new book out.

In any event, Rivers is now going after Chaz and Sonny Bono in her unending quest to get attention. She seems to think it's funny. I guess she's forgotten how all those Elizabeth Taylor jokes in the 80's backfired on her, especially when Taylor lost all the weight and lashed out at Rivers in defense.

Rivers spoke with host Marc Lamont Hill when she held up a Ken doll (of the Barbie line) and pointed out that the doll does not have male genitalia.

'Ken I think, unfortunately ... I found out to be Chaz Bono,' Rivers said as Hill dissolved into laughter.

Said Hill: 'You're saying Ken has a vagina?' Rivers: 'Ken is good looking but nothing at home.'

Rivers then slammed Sonny Bono, and went on to comment in her own defense in what sounds like a quest to redeem herself:

You don't make jokes about people no one knows.

Duh! The point I'm focusing on is that regardless of what anyone thinks about all this old time trash humor, Rivers is getting the best free attention. I'm not knocking her for that. I just wish she went about it in a slightly different way.

But, of course, I think the main thing to remember here is that I like to think Rivers thinks in terms of comedy first...whether we agree with that or not.

There's more here.

Gays Denied Swimming Pass

I find this article both inspiring and courageous because it's not a position Tony and I would ever be in because we've always avoided places like this swimming pool in Ohio. I'm not saying that's a good thing on our part either. We grew up in a time when guys like LaBarbera condemned us and women of WTF-ery like Joan Rivers treated us like pet poodles. But A lesbian couple isn't taking anymore shit, and they are basically fighting city hall in order to get some kind of family law rewritten so they can get discounted passes to a public pool.

For the past nine years, Melody Mohn and her children have made regular use of the Heise Park Pool in Galion, Ohio. This year, in an effort to save money, she applied for a family pass – to cover herself, her four children and same-sex partner, Hela Young.

However, when she called the YMCA in charge of managing the pool, she was informed that a family is defined as 'mother, father, and three children.' Her request was therefore denied.

There's more here. The city council claims they didn't know the law existed.

Small Town Romance Writer

 

 

by Ryan Field

 

 

Amazon Link

 

 



In this 113,000 word gay romance, when bad boy male stripper, Ethan, and quiet academic, Travis, first meet at the storied Iowa Writers’ Workshop in l990 neither one of them know this unusual relationship will consume the next twenty years of their lives…even as their lives change, they meet new people, and they each take different paths as career writers.
Ten years later, Travis is a well-respected author in the LGBT community who is up for a prestigious literary award and Ethan is still a struggling gay erotic romance author writing short stories for small LGBT presses. But all this is about to change when Ethan soon becomes famous for a gay romance that Travis thinks is quite possibly the worst book ever written.

As Ethan’s mainstream writing career progresses and he’s dubbed the Small Town Billionaire Author, Travis’s career moves forward in more subtle, literary ways. Although there are times when Travis is jealous of Ethan’s fame and fortune, he’s found the young man he thinks is the love of his life and nothing else matters. In fact, his life seems perfect…until tragedy strikes and leaves him with nowhere to turn but to Ethan.

Years after that, both Ethan and Travis have evolved in many ways as men and authors. They also find themselves in situations they hadn’t predicted, and the tables have turned on them. Their long-lasting, unusual relationship is challenged once again when Ethan is up for the same award Travis won twenty years earlier, and this time it’s either going to make them or break them.    

Penis Size and Gay Men; Joan Rivers Goes Too Far? More Gays Than Lesbians; Down the Basement by Ryan Field

Penis Size and Gay Men

Of course this is about penis size once again, and it's not really an article. But I often find that forums where people talk about topics like this can be far more honest and realistic than those "studies" we see mentioned in magazines and posts.

In this case the topic is how gay men feel about penis size. If you are of the sensitive variety, you've been warned this isn't what you'll find in any text book.

Why would anyone want a small one?\ \ I hate seeing a pencil dick or tiny little thing and thinking, yuck. Especially when you're expecting a good one.\ \ Aesthetic yes...just looking at one of those monsters gets my mouth a'waterin.


But to be perfectly honest, I don't think any of these things (the studies or the forums) are very accurate. Every single comment could be disputed. Deep down would most people be willing to admit, openly, they would prefer a small penis over a large one? I'm not talking about those with specific preferences. I'm talking about the millions out there on Grindr and social networks and porn sites. 


You can read more here. None of the opinions on this link reflect my personal opinions. 


Joan Rivers Goes Too Far?

Update: Link to Fredricka Whitfield's Facebook page where people have been leaving comments about Whitfield's interview with Rivers. It's interesting because most seem to be one-sided.


Update 2: Evidently, Joan Rivers used the "tranny" word, which I've posted about many times before. This wasn't in the original link or I would have mentioned it. I don't use the T word, but many still do. They feel it's part of their culture. But I still don't think referring to anyone as gay or trans should be considered a slur and I think we should all rethink that. This isn't about Joan Rivers or Michelle Obama or even a word. This is about trans abuse, much of which seems to be coming from the LGBTI community.


Iconic performer, Joan Rivers, made headlines twice recently. She was promoting her new book with a snarky CNN reporter, Fredricka Whitfield, and stormed off the set in the middle of the interview, and then when she made interesting comments about the President and his wife.




I have some very strong opinions on this I'll post at the end.


CNN's Fredericka Whitfield goaded Rivers during an interview that was supposed to be about her new book with questions about how mean Rivers is on Fashion Police. 



When the anchor described the fashion critiques as “very mean in some ways,” the 81-year-old cut her off.

“It’s not mean, it’s not mean, it’s not mean,” she said. “I tell the truth.”

“I’m sure I say the same things that all your viewers say to their friends sitting next to them on the couch,” Rivers added.



 
“We’re one of the few shows that says ‘that’s an ugly dress.’ … These ladies make $28 million a picture. You really think that Nicki Minaj cares I didn’t like her dress?”

You can read more here about that.   Frankly, that PC attitude of all CNN reporters is why I haven't watched CNN since they gave Joy Behar her own TV show. I still won't watch CNN even though Behar's show was canceled for lack of ratings.

Even more interesting is this next piece about Rivers commenting on the President and his wife.

The comedian known for her lack of self-censoring recently officiated a same-sex wedding and was asked by a photographer if she believed the United States would ever see the first gay or female president. Her response was typical Rivers.



"We already have it with Obama, so let's just calm down," she said. "You know Michelle (Obama) is a trans."

This didn't sit well with many people. Here's my issue.


So Joan Rivers makes a comment about the President being gay and the First Lady being trans and people are getting upset? Does this mean there's something wrong with gay people and trans people? Is it a negative reflection on the Obamas to be compared to anyone in the LGBT community? I find it highly insulting as a gay man to think anyone would find these comments as negative. We already know that Joan Rivers has always been a huge supporter of the LGBTI community. I don't understand what motivated Rivers to make the comments. But comments like this should not be associated with shame or disrespect. There's nothing shameful or disrespectful about being gay or transgender, not even for the President and First Lady...unless, of course, you belong to the Westboro Baptist Church.  


There's more here. This article calls it a trans slur. Yes. Liberal Huff Po calls it a trans slur. And the only slur I find is that the article calls it a slur.

I think this is the kind of double standard from liberal media that bothers me the most. We'll support you, LGBTI people, but just don't call our President gay or trans. At least we know where we stand with the conservative media.

More Gays Than Lesbians

This is another one of those articles I always seem to think might be flawed. It's focused on how the average person in Britain knows more gay men than lesbians.

 Statistics show the average British person knows 5.5 gay men and 3.1 lesbian women. The poll only focused on these two aspects of the LGBTI community.

It gives more detail here. This part is even more interesting. The average LGBTI person knows 21.6 gay men and 10.3 lesbian women. Location plays a huge part, too.

I take none of these studies seriously because I would bet half of all gays, men and women, still aren't out of the closet.

Down the Basement

 

by Ryan Field

 

 

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Amazon Review:


Ryan Field is top of the class when it comes to cross dressing and female attire erotica and this is one of his hottest. The sense of danger as Rush takes care of the drunken jocks who could suddenly discover his secret and beat him up is palpable as is the erotic tension. The situation is plausible and the 'surprise' ending is a nice touch.

Joan Rivers Flips Leno; Beyonce As Marilyn Monroe

Joan Rivers Flips Leno

I think this is pop culture news, and also gay news because like it or not Joan Rivers is an icon to some gay men. But in all seriousness, she's no fool, she makes most feminists look lazy, and she's always taken control of her own life and her circumstances. And after years of being banned from the Tonight Show, thanks to the way women are often treated in Hollywood (and the fact that straight white men still control Hollywood), Rivers finally made a return appearance thanks to Jimmy Fallon.

You can watch a clip here where Rivers discusses the Tonight Show appearance and also discusses how she feels about the way she was treated...largely, she believes, because she was a woman. She also flips Jay Leno the bird for banning her from the show.

I used to watch the Tonight Show when I was a kid back when Johnny Carson hosted the show. I vaguely remember Joan Rivers as a guest host. Whatever happened between Rivers and Carson can only be told by Rivers now because Carson never spoke about it in public. In the same respect, Jay Leno never had Joan Rivers back on the tonight show either. The only reason I find that interesting is because I never once watched the Tonight Show after Carson retired. There was just no way I could deal with Leno as Carson's replacement. I just never got it...or him.

I'm finally watching the Tonight Show again thanks to Jimmy Fallon.

Beyoncé As Marilyn Monroe

Tony and I finally traded in our twelve year old Jag and bought a new car this past January. I loved that Jag. We bought it on the showroom floor twelve years ago and I fought to keep it for the last four years. But it was getting up there and it was time to trade it in for something new. And with the new car I discovered satellite radio for the first time and I can now listen to Ryan Seacrest in the morning. When I heard about Beyoncé channeling Marilyn Monroe on Seacrest's show this morning I earmarked it for a post because it's interesting to see Monroe's legacy alive after all these years. Beyoncé will be on the cover of Out Magazine in May, in full Marilyn drag...and using the exposure as a platform for feminism.

The 32-year-old pop superstar — who poses topless while wearing a platinum wig — channels her inner Marilyn Monroe for a timeless black-and-white photo shoot and talks about her self-titled album and feminism. Although the “Drunk in Love” singer has mastered the art of surprise, it’s no secret that she is an advocate for women’s right, and now she’s using her magazine spread as a platform to once again influence female liberation.

You can read more here.

I posted about Beyoncé's clever marketing ploy last Christmas here. That time it was Beyoncé who flipped the proverbial bird to Amazon.

Amazon and Target refused to sell Beyonce's new album because she released it on iTunes first, with a one week iTunes exclusive. It's interesting because the very thing Amazon did to me with the exclusive they require for the lending program is the exact same thing they penalized Beyonce for doing with Apple. Beyonce retaliated by going to a Wal-Mart store this past weekend where she gave 750 shoppers a fifty dollar gift card, an amount that totaled something close to thirty eight thousand dollars.

Amazon clearly survived the gesture.

14 Gay Negative Statements; Honoring Stonewall in London

14 Gay Negative Statements

This article claims there are 14 things you should never say to a gay man. Of course it's a tongue-in-cheek piece and none of it's written in stone, however, I noticed a few things I've posted about over the years myself and it's interesting in a general sense to see I wasn't the only one thinking this way. I thought this line was interesting: "the factory of Sex in the City tokenism." I've used the old TV show Sex in the City so many times as a point of reference I have too many posts up to link to one thing in particular.

In any event, I agree with some of the statements, I'm not so sure about others. The gay community is very diverse. Just last night Tony and I were watching the TV show House Hunters where a gay couple was looking for a property in NJ within commuting distance to Manhattan. They looked at one place in Jersey City in Trump Tower and one of them actually said he would like to live there because he could tell all his friends he lives in Trump Tower...as if that's the most important thing in the house hunting process for him. We switched channels after that comment. It was too Sex in the City for us. We're more interested in space, views, future property values, and the pragmatic issues that accompany becoming a home owner, not whether or not we can brag about living in Trump Tower. And, last I heard, Donald Trump wasn't supporting gay people.

3. “I'm like a gay man trapped inside a woman's body.”

I know you're trying to connect with me, but what does that even mean? Does that make me a straight woman trapped inside a gay man's body? Trust me, there's a lot more to being gay than enjoying nice clothes and hooking up with dudes.

4. "How do you know you're gay if you've never been with a woman?"

Did you need to experiment with women to know you were straight? What about porcupines? How do you know you wouldn't enjoy sex with a porcupine if you don't at least try it?

These are just two of the 14 I thought were interesting, and two I've personally heard many times myself. The rest are just as informative and entertaining. There are gay men who love Sex in the City. I don't understand why. But they do. It's all about diversity.

You can read more here.

Side note: This one below is for Joan and Melissa Rivers They had a wedding shower (or bachelorette party thing) episode on their reality show last year where the token gay guy went along as one of the girls. Of course I'm sure he's being paid well, and some gay guys will do anything for a buck. But seriously. It's time to knock it off.

7. “Come to girl’s night!”

If I’m invited then it’s not girl’s night. Stop calling it that! I’m not a girl!

Honoring Stonewall in London

This is the kind of thing I love to see. When the LGBT community comes together on a global level the way they are doing in London at the 2014 Pride event.

Pride in London 2014 will pay tribute to the 45th anniversary of the Stonewall Riots in New York, a turning point for the LGBTI liberation movement.

You can read more here.

Joan Rivers Defends Baldwin; Gay Thanksgiving Throwback

Joan Rivers Defends Baldwin

The only reason I'm posting about either of these two is because it goes along with the next part of this post, and how gay men like Tony and I have had to deal with being gay and living in a world where gay slurs often hit so hard and with such force it can unhinge the very core of someone's psychological well-being. The closeted gay Amish friend I have knows what I'm talking about. The gay teen from Brooklyn whose father is a macho cop and uncle a macho fireman knows what I'm talking about. Any gay man who can pass as straight and who has ever feared being exposed knows what I'm talking about.

You can call me pretty much anything now and I'll live, trust me on that. And that's because I've been called everything there is at one point or another. I might even come after you and enjoy every minute of it. But there are a lot of other gay men who aren't as secure and when they hear a gay slur it stings hard. Harder than most people would expect. Especially when the gay slur is made with vitriol and used with other pejoratives that conjure the worst associations.

I've posted about Alec Baldwin and what's been happening since he made his "alleged" gay slurs, and not for the first time. And today the elderly entertainer, Joan Rivers, came out and supported him with what I can only describe as some kind of quasi Lenny Bruce freedom of speech defense. And in her attempt to disabuse the notions of Baldwin's critics and what happened as a result of Baldwin's public rant she only comes off looking way out of touch with the rest of America at best.

 "Everybody just relax," Rivers noted, before hurling a series of slurs against Italians, African-Americans, Jews and gays, among other groups. "Everybody's something, so why don't we all just calm down?"

I've also posted about Rivers before, too, and how she often treats gay men as if they are pet poodles. I understand that a good deal of her thoughts and even her comedy material is generational and she comes from a time when the only openly gay men were the poor souls who couldn't hide in a closet even if they tried. But the world has changed in the past decade, not all gay men are the same, and many of us don't appreciate being treated as if we are a side show at the circus. At the risk of sounding like an angry gay man, it's time to start giving all gay people the respect other minorities receive and that includes caution with words. It's not that we don't have a sense of humor either. Ellen makes us laugh and she's not hurting anyone.

You can read more about Rivers here.

Gay Thanksgiving Throwback

Tony and I have a great deal for which to be thankful and we don't take anything for granted. We've been through life and death situations and survived, we've been through opening businesses that were risky and did well, and we've been through living as a couple when gay marriage was still just a concept. For the past five years or so we've hosted a big Thanksgiving at our home for both our families. One year we emptied our living room and rented ten large tables and chairs so everyone had a place to sit. It varies from year to year because like all families brothers and sisters go to in-laws, take vacations, or just stay home and do their own thing. This year is smaller, with only twelve people, but the fact that we actually host Thanksgiving still blows me away.

We met in 1992 in December and our first Thanksgiving was in 1993. We went to separate Thanksgiving dinners because that's what was expected of us. We both come from similar family backgrounds and neither of us was out of the closet at that point. In my case my family knew and it wasn't discussed. In Tony's case they had no idea. And for the first fifteen years of our relationship/marriage, that's how we spent Thanksgiving day. For a while we became friendly with an older gay couple who hosted Thanksgiving dinner later at night each year. So Tony would go to his family, I would go to mine, and then we would meet up in separate cars later that night to be with other gay people. At least thanks to these friends we had a chance to spend part of Thanksgiving together. But just imagine for a moment what it would be like if you weren't able to spend major holidays with your spouse for reasons beyond your control. Sure, we could have come out totally and slammed everyone at one time. But for us that's not how things were done. And I know we're not the only ones who lived this way.

But it started to get tired fast. Here we were living as a married couple and we didn't even get a chance to spend holidays together because of the fact that we were gay. I never pushed Tony with the issue about his family because I knew it was a sensitive topic and I didn't want to hurt him. You do those things for people you love and you make sacrifices. All that changed in 2007 when Tony was hospitalized and almost died. I've posted about that before and I'm not getting into it again. But that's when I met Tony's family for the first time, under the worst circumstances imaginable. Thankfully, it turned out to be a good thing and we supported each other through his illness and came out stronger because of that. I think of his family as mine now, and he's the same way with my family. And since then life is much easier for us because of that time. It's also better because we are living in different times and more and more gay people are coming out, getting married, and fighting for equal rights. However, I know there are other gay couples just like us doing the same things we used to do. And when I hear gay slurs, and I hear people defending gay slurs, it reminds me of all the holidays we missed and all the good times we lost when we were younger.

The first home we lived in was a town house about eight miles from where we live right now. But it wasn't New Hope where things are more progressive, and we were smack in the middle of a cookie cutter town house development on a cul-de-sac in suburban Philadelphia, Newtown, PA. We were so busy back then we rarely took much notice of what was happening around us. But one Thanksgiving weekend in 1998 while we were putting up Christmas decorations outside our neighbor's little boy said, "We should put up lights just like the fags next door, dad." The father grabbed the kid and pulled him inside fast. We listed the town house the following week and moved to New Hope six months later so we'd never be placed in that particular degrading situation again.

I know I've told that story before somewhere, but when I heard about Baldwin and now Rivers, I felt like telling it again so people will understand the magnitude of what the word fag means to us.

The Cheney Sisters!! Joan Rivers Fights Back

The Cheney Sisters!!

Former Vice-President Dick Cheney's daughters, Liz and Mary Cheney, are at odds over gay marriage. Mary Cheney is a lesbian and she's married to Heather Poe (in the article I'm linking to they refer to Poe as Cheney's "partner," not wife...must have been written in a state where marriage isn't legal yet) and Liz Cheney is running for office in Wyoming and she made a statement recently stating she's for the traditional definition of marriage between one man and one woman.

Vice-President Cheney issued this statement:

"This is an issue we have dealt with privately for many years, and we are pained to see it become public," the statement reads, according to NBC. "Since it has, one thing should be clear. Liz has always believed in the traditional definition of marriage. She has also always treated her sister and her sister’s family with love and respect, exactly as she should have done. Compassion is called for, even when there is a disagreement about such a fundamental matter and Liz’s many kindnesses shouldn’t be used to distort her position."

The Vice-President does support gay marriage in states where it's legal.

Evidently, Liz Cheney doesn't and she's going to not only go down on the wrong side of history she's going to be remembered as the woman who stabbed her own gay sister in the back to get a vote.

You can read more here. It's actually one of the saddest things I've read in a long time.


Joan Rivers Fights Back

When I saw this I wanted to post about it, and not because of the actual content, but more from a social media POV. I've started to see a lot of high profile people slam each other on social media, as if this is their new voice...and vehicle...to say and do whatever they want. In this case, Jennifer Lawrence decided to slam Joan Rivers and Rivers' TV show, Fashion Police, because Lawrence, thin as a rail, thinks FP is promoting the wrong body image for women. Rivers fought back this time.

Lawrence said:

'The world has this idea that if you don't look like an airbrushed perfect model. You have to see past it. You look how you look, you have to be comfortable,' she said during the Q&A.

'What are you going to do? Be hungry every single day to make other people happy? That's just dumb.'

Rivers took to Twitter:


Calling out the Hunger Games star, the 80-year-old nastily spat: 'It’s funny how Jennifer Lawrence loved @E_FashionPolice during Awards Season when we were complimenting her every single week...


You can read more tweets from Rivers here. But I think it's interesting that the article states Rivers "spat," and Lawrence "shared her refreshingly candid views." Now if that's not biased I don't know what is.

And I didn't notice Lawrence looking a pound overweight. I could get a grasp on this coming from Gabourey Sidibe, and even feel the need to support her. But coming from privileged Lawrence it loses luster, so to speak.

You know, I happen to agree with the First Lady, Michelle Obama, on this topic. We should be conscious of everything we eat, and not for vanity reasons or body image. We should be eating for health and if looking good and being thin is a side effect of that I don't see how being hungry can hurt. We have a serious issue with weight and medical issues in the US, and as people get older these issues due to weight only get worse. But Lawrence only seems concerned with body image. But more important, Lawrence mentions women only with regard to body image, as if this doesn't even affect men. Has anyone else seen all the ads for ripped bodies and washboard abs? They hock men with unrealistic photos and images that most likely aren't even real. Maybe I'm the only one. Maybe this is just a woman's issue. (That's sarcasm)

But back to my original point. Last week I saw a male C-list celebrity slam Miley Cyrus for the way she dresses and the way she acts, on facebook. I doubt Cyrus saw this because this guy isn't important enough to make big news, however, if she had seen it she would have been justified in fighting back. In other words, now in the age of social media when people are so free to throw the first proverbial punch online they need to be prepared for what they might get in retaliation. I personally learned that lesson a long time ago on a smaller scale in the writing community and I've had things happen to me where I would react in a totally different way now. 

Michael Vick Cancels Book Signing; Joan Rivers' Lesbian Kiss; "He's Bewitched"

In an unfortunate turn of events, football star, Michael Vick, canceled his book signing schedule and a book tour that would take him to Atlanta, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania. Whether or not he will be signing books in other states is unclear.

The reason for the cancellation was that Vick has allegedly received death threats that stem from his involvement with dog fighting. After serving time in prison for this he's been outspoken about his mistakes, rectifying his mistakes, and he's supported the Humane Society. The book he wrote is titled, "Finally Free," and the canceled book signings were to be held in Barnes & Noble stores.

Vick spokesman Chris Shigas said the threats, first reported by McManus, were “very disturbing.” Since his release from prison, Vick has spoken publicly at Humane Society events. ”We understand that a lot of people out there will never forgive him,” Shigas said (via Philly.com’s Les Bowen). “But at what point do we say a line has been crossed?”

We're living in interesting times. I'm a dog owner, one is a rescue. I've been involved with local Humane Society organizations since I was in high school...before it became the chic thing to do. I have never been to a dog fight, I know nothing about dog fights, and I don't plan to ever know anything about dog fights. But I do think it's interesting that people who are so concerned about dogs and keeping them safe from harm would threaten the life of a human being. If there's something humane in that, I'm missing it. It would be nice to see a follow up on this, and to learn that whoever made these death threats was found and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

Joan Rivers' Lesbian Kiss

I wrote a post once about how I sometimes find it offensive when comedians joke about gays in a way that promotes the same old stereotypes, and that gay men aren't pet poodles for straight women. However, I'm not without a sense of humor and I often laugh at these jokes if they're done right. I have many friends who are straight women and they don't treat me like a pet poodle. I even make these myself sometimes...I'm all for self-deprecation. I write erotic romance and if you can't laugh at sex sometimes what's the point? Sometimes sex is funny.

Recently, Joan Rivers had a scene on her reality show, "Joan Knows Best," where she kissed a lesbian, and this time she nailed it. Not only did she redeem herself, she did it with humor and the attitude that there's no shame at all in a lesbian kiss.

Joan Rivers’ self proclaimed “lesbian” kiss and Rivers’ Costco book ban dominates the new season of Joan Knows Best premiere tonight on WETV. Joan Rivers makes out with a lesbian in a on-screen kiss tonight.

You can read more here.

The underlying message here is shame. Once you take the shame away from being gay there's nothing left to worry about. And Joan Rivers did it with comedy this time.

He's Bewitched

Being that "He's Bewitched" has been on the bestseller list again at Ravenous Romance, I thought I'd post an excerpt that's never been published before for free. As readers, we do get good excerpts at places like Allromanceebooks.com, but I think readers like more sometimes. So I try to pick out interesting things in the book and do them here on the blog.

This is a scene from the book where the main characters are taking a road trip in a vintage 1962 Lincoln Continental to Provincetown....as some gay friends I know refer to it: The Holy Land. A good deal of this book was written with parody and sarcasm and it wasn't meant to be taken as seriously as other books I've written (thank you to one book reviewer, Gerry Burnie, who got it a long time ago). But I did make a few points I feel strongly about. And all the sex scenes at the infamous dick dock are based on experience. There are those who would lead us to believe there is no dick dock in P'town. They are lying.

They left Manhattan after eating large breakfasts in a crowded restaurant in the West Village. Michelle directed him out of the city, along the busy Henry Hudson Parkway. She wore a white cotton dress, and her hair was pulled back in a French twist; a few thin strands fell from the sides and blew back because the top was down. Eloise’s tight, sprayed hair never moved, but she wore a scarf anyway. She sat up front with Brett. In the backseat were Rhys, Michelle and Tag. The little designer dog carrier sat between them in front of the rear fold-down arm rest. “Watch the signs for the Merritt Parkway, Brett,” Michelle said. “I will,” said Brett. He’d been driving this route all his life and knew all the short cuts to Cape Cod by then.

He wasn’t speaking much that morning. He was concentrating on how well Michelle and Rhys seemed to be getting along in the back seat. While they laughed and joked about a book they’d both read, he watched the road and hunched forward to change lanes. Michelle’s face was animated and bright, and her arms, waving around in the rear view mirror, went up every time Rhys said something clever and funny.

There were times when he felt guilty about his relationship with Michelle. They were as close as brother and sister, but sometimes he felt as if he’d let her down. She would have been the perfect fag hag if only he’d been the flamboyant, limp-wrist type who loved chick flicks and shopping. But his idea of shopping was walking into a store and buying the first outfit he saw on display so he could get out fast. And his idea of a good movie was usually an action adventure film starring Bruce Willis. When they saw “Brokeback Mountain” together (she'd dragged him there), she was so excited that a gay film had finally hit the mainstream she couldn’t stop bouncing and chattering in the ticket line. And he just stood there and smiled, nodding his head and agreeing with everything she said. And after the movie, when she’d raved about how well they’d treated the subject, he smiled too. But he didn’t agree with her. He saw fatal, fundamental flaws that only a gay man would notice.

The Merritt Parkway was smooth and simple. But I95 North was stocked with traffic when they reached New Haven. The endless road construction was still going on. In the afternoon sun, you could see waves of heat rippling up from cars; an impatient idiot in a large SUV kept dodging in and out of lanes. It was stop and go for a ten mile stretch, and after that you could barely do 50 miles per hour. So Brett got off 95 and took a short cut up I395 North toward Providence.

When he finally passed through Providence and reached The Fall River Bridge in Massachusetts, he took a deep breath and sighed. Depending on conditions, The Cape was usually a four or five hour drive from New York. And when he reached Fall River, the trip always seemed to go faster. He knew he was close to the bottom of The Cape; he could actually smell the salty, ocean air. He’d never actually been in Fall River, but he loved it just the same because it meant he was almost home.

Then halfway across The Fall River Bridge the rear end of the car started to bounce and wobble. It was the same bouncing that had happened in Maryland when the tire had gone flat in Martha Falls, but now it was even worse. Eloise had been dozing. She jumped up and pressed her palm to her throat. He slowed down and inched to the far left lane. Good thing the left lane was closed for construction work (even though there didn’t seem to be any work going on), because the old Lincoln didn’t have automatic flashing lights. Thankfully, it was safe there and they wouldn’t slow down the flow of traffic.

What the Stars are Reading, Writing, and Karina Smirnoff's Comments on Fifty Shades of Grey

I always find it interesting to read what's being read and talked about in the mainstream. Usually I get this information from magazines like Time and People. Of course Time is more conservative, but I think People magazine's articles about books are probably more accurate when it comes to the mainstream. I also like the fact that People magazine is now posting, on the address label above my name, "People now on select tablets!" Evidently, they know where their market is headed.

Sigourney Weaver is reading "Catherine the Great," by Robert K. Massie. She says this about it:

"History is fascinating, and she was fascinating because she actually tried to abolish serfdom. She was way ahead of her time."

I'm not running to Amazon to get a copy any time soon.

Anna Kendrick is reading "Writing Movies for Fun and Profit," by Robert Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon. She says this:

"They're from Reno 911. Even if you have no interest in screenwriting, it's hilarious - I was snorting reading it."

I'll pass on this, too. If I'm going to read about screenwriting, I don't want to snort. There are plenty of bad romances out there I can buy to do that.

And, Karina Smirnoff is reading, of all things, "Fifty Shades of Grey," by E.L. James. You have to love what she says:

"Friends told me it was a must-read, so I finally gave in and bought it. It's definitely the kind of book that makes you blush, yet it's so well-written."

If she freaking blushes at FSoG, she'd drop dead reading one of my books. But I digress. I do think her two comments about friends telling her to read the book, and about how well-written FSoG is are very interesting. I liked FSoG, but wouldn't call it well-written, or poorly written. It is what it is. But this is what the buzz is all about when it comes to mainstream bestsellers. Word of mouth.

And last but not least, Joan Rivers has a new book out titled, "I Hate Everyone...Starting with Me."

It received three and a half stars (four stars being the best) by the People magazine book reviewer. And I'm not surprised. I've read two of Joan's non-fiction books in the past and she's not only a bright, articulate author, she doesn't hold back anything. You get what you pay for.

This line alone would tempt me to buy this book:

"Just once I would like to see a Chinese couple adopt a gay baby."

The review also says:

"Joan Rivers is extraordinary, but she's not for the easily offended...or for anyone who gets offended at all."

It takes a lot to offend me. But I know that's not the case with so many these days.

Joan Rivers and Bethenny Frankel: Gay Men Aren't Pet Poodles

(Update to post: You can see how much reality TV I watch. I was informed I spelled Ms. Frankel's name wrong. I will make that change. If I missed one, please forgive my grave error.)

Poodles and gay men are two of the most misrepresented groups in the world. When most people think about poodles, they think about prissy, high-strung dogs who yap all the time and prance around in silly haircuts and rhinestone collars. When most people think about gay men they think about what they've seen on TV shows and films like "Sex in the City," where every strong woman has at least one effeminate gay friend to hang out with. Trust me on this, poodles are nothing like that and neither are gay men. I have two poodles and the reason why I have them is because they are one of the smartest, strongest breeds out there. I used to show Irish Setters in obedience. I got tired of losing and got myself a poodle. Whenever I stepped into a ring and I saw either a poodle or a German Shepperd I knew I was screwed. Poodles can also be as vicious as Pit Bulls, and they prefer to be outside catching snakes instead of inside on fluffy pillows. And, like gay men, if you cross a poodle not only will he snap back fast but he'll never forget you crossed him.

But this isn't about dogs. A few things prompted this post. The first was a comment I read a few weeks ago by an older gay author and book reviewer whom I admire a great deal. He read an article where someone asked Joan Collins how she feels about gay men and she allegedly replied by saying something about how much she loves gay men and never likes to go anywhere without one. The gay male author I admire posted something like this in reply: "Why do I now feel like a pet poodle."

Another reason why I'm posting about this is because I was asked to participate in a TV reality show a few weeks ago. A producer in Hollywood contacted one of my publishers and asked if she could recommend someone. My publisher recommended me and the producer contacted me right away. From what I gather, it's a reality show about romance authors...romance authors in general, not just m/m romance authors. I answered a few questions, replied nicely, and spent a lot of time thinking about this reality show over that weekend. Ultimately, after I answered the basic questions, before it went any further, I declined and thanked the producer for considering me. I did this partly because I'm a writer, not a TV personality and I love what I do as a writer. I also declined because I've seen the way these reality shows represent gay men...very poorly...and I didn't want to wind up as someone's pet poodle. I think you feminists out there can relate to this with regard to beauty pageants, and the way women have always been represented (or misrepresented) in beauty pageants. I was never a fan of beauty pageants for this reason. It's basically the same reason why I declined on the reality show.

The main reason why I'm writing about this now is because Tony and I accidentally watched two reality shows on TV this week I rarely ever have time to watch. One was a show by someone I'd never even heard of until I watched the show and googled her name: Bethenny Frankel. The show is about Bethenny Frankel's life (a reality TV diva from what I gather), in general, with the same quasi reality theme all these shows have...even though it all looks completely staged and there isn't an ounce of reality to it.

But there was nothing else on, so we didn't switch the channel. In one scene, Bethenny and an older woman with a very negative attitude go shopping. And guess where they go? That's right. To the gay guys who own a posh high end furniture gallery in New York. I think Ms. Frankel even commented about how much she loves to visit her "boys," (meaning her gay male friends) on her way into the gallery. This scene mirrored every single offensive "Sex in the City" scene with gay men being treated like women...just one of the girls...I'd ever witnessed. Tony and I watched for a few minutes, rolled our eyes, and promptly changed the channel. You have to understand where we are coming from. Tony was a corporate executive who traveled the world for twenty years until he started his own company. He worked with strong women in corporate and they always treated each other with mutual respect. No one, trust me on this, ever treated Tony the way Ms. Frankel treated the gay guys who owned that store in New York. If they had, they wouldn't have been able to speak for a month (smile).

And Ms. Frankel's show wasn't even that bad, at least not considering other shows I've seen. I wouldn't even be writing this post if I hadn't watched the Joan Rivers, "Joan and Melissa" show last night. Again, Tony flipped to the channel by accident and we wound up watching something we normally wouldn't watch. I'm a fan of Joan Rivers. She's been around for a long time and I respect her survival instincts. Of course I believe her show is as much about reality as I believe the candidates running for President right now. But it's not a bad show either; I like bologna. Some of the lines are hysterical. I was enjoying it...and then the classic gay guy pet poodle came on and Tony and I wound up rolling our eyes again. In Joan's show, the gay guy is a middle aged comic who opens for Joan before she goes on and does her act. I'm sure he's paid well for what he does. He's just one of the girls, which is classic in regard to how reality TV shows and Hollywood have been treating gay men for years. In last night's show, this guy put on his make up and went to a bachelorette party with all the women, and Joan actually referred to him as the "sister" she always wanted to have. Evidently, he doesn't mind this at all.

Now I do know this is a combination of generation gap and money. Joan comes from a time when the only openly gay men were the most effeminate and enjoyed being treated like pet poodles...for a buck. Again, I'm not knocking these guys because they did what they had to do to survive in a world where there weren't LGBT rights. No one talked about diversity and tolerance back then. In some ways, it's still like that to this day and we, as gay men, have a long way to go in the self-esteem department. Joan also knows how to get a laugh and what people will laugh at. And gay men behaving like prissy women are right up there at the top of the funny ha-ha list in stand up comedy. They all do this; it's not exclusive to Joan Rivers. And we all know there is no limit to how far anyone will go when it comes to making money.

The most interesting thing about all this is that some of the most powerful gay men in Hollywood were not openly gay and they were not treated like pet poodles. Joan Rivers and Bethenny Frankel wouldn't have treated Rock Hudson or Merv Griffin that way. I do know that there are, indeed, gay men who like to be treated like one of the girls. I'm not slamming them in this post and I really don't care how they choose to live their lives. I want to make it clear that I'm not discriminating against them. It's just that I often wonder where the Al Sharpton hero is for the gay male community when someone does or says something offensive with regard to gay men. I've always been the first one to laugh at myself. I wrote about a burping dick once and I've been writing parodies for years. I think I have a sense of humor. But I also think it's time that we stop laughing at gay men the same way we have stopped laughing at people of African descent, or Asian descent, or any descent for that matter. I don't like it when things get PC and people have to stand on guard constantly. But there should be some lines drawn so all gay men aren't misrepresented and exploited to the mainstream public in such obvious ways. We're fighting for some serious rights and we need to be taken seriously in order to get them. I feel strongly about this with regard to the way women are treated, too. I just don't comment about it often because I'm not a woman and I don't feel I have the right to do this.

I'm also no one's pet poodle. Neither is my partner, Tony. I would rather go to a funeral than suffer through a bride's bachelorette party...even if Joan Rivers was paying me to do it. Just the thought of going to a bachelorette party makes me want to scratch my nuts and spit on the sidewalk in retaliation. I'm not one of Bethenny Frankel's "boys." I don't like to shop, arrange flowers, or pick out fabrics. I like fast cars, straight vodka, and a good cigar every once in a while. I like sex with men, but that doesn't make me a woman. I don't like to gossip, shop for anything, or listen to Broadway show tunes. I know more than a handful of gay men who are just like me and feel the same way I do. And for every single gay man who doesn't mind being treated like a pet poodle...or who is willing to be treated like one for money...there are at least ten more who wouldn't allow it to happen.

Joan Rivers Drops F-Bomb on Red Carpet: 'Stop Campaigning' and 'Take Car...

I've seen various slants on what Joan Rivers said below. Many have been twisted. But if you view this with objectivity...which is something we don't seem to have much of these days in the mainstream media in America...you'll see that she's talking about ALL politicians, not just any one politician in particular. And, frankly, I couldn't agree with her more about celebrities (or authors trying to promote fiction) getting involved in politics.