Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Russell Tovey Worst Gay Ever?; Gay Men At CPAC; Meadows Are Not Forever by Ryan Field

Russell Tovey Worst Gay Ever?

Russell Tovey from Looking recently got slammed by gay men for comments he made about gay men. Russell Tovey is an openly gay man himself. The remarks he made are being called "controversial." James Franco can make fools of us daily and almost everyone laughs, but what Tovey said is "controversial." Interesting.

The actor made the headline-making comments in a March 1 interview with The Guardian's Tom Lamont. In the interview, Tovey recalled his father's refusal to send him to a "theater school" during his teen years. 

"I feel like I could have been really effeminate, if I hadn't gone to the school that I went to," he said. "Where I felt like I had to toughen up. If I'd have been able to relax, prance around, sing in the street, I might be a different person now. I thank my dad for that, for now allowing me to go down that path." 

That experience, he added, "has probably given me the unique quality that people think I have," which appeared to hint as his ability to play both gay and straight roles in film and on television. 

And then Twitter went berserk.

You can read more here. There are tweets where Tovey apologized. They look sincere.

I'm only going to make one comment on this one. With all the discrimination, cultural appropriation, and hate gay people face these days maybe it's time we stop slamming each other and start going after the James Franco's of the world. Because not a day goes by when I don't see a privileged straight person doing something to get attention with gay bait.

Now, here's an article where Tovey is dubbed "The Worst Gay Ever." Who is calling him this? Well, think about that, and then think about who actually runs the painfully dismal gay media that only represents a small portion of gay men fairly and objectively. 

Gay Men At CPAC

This is one of those things that never surprises me because I've seen it first hand and I know it really happens. But I know that it does surprise people, because it's not something you would think would happen...gay conservatives. (I'm always somewhere in the middle so I do think I can be objective about it.)

Paul Detric, a reporter for Reason.TV, attended this year's Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) and used the gay hook-up app Grindr to try and track down gays attending the event. Rather unsurprisingly, he found a number of them and several were willing to talk to Detric -- though not necessarily on camera. 

Here's one quote I found interesting.

"Especially for conservatives to be able to win an election, they're going to need to get younger voters. To do that they need to start being more socially liberal -- essentially they need to shift libertarian.”

Another young man added, "if we're true conservatives, we really don't want the government to be involved in our lives -- period."

Even though I'm not all that political, the one thing I always find fascinating is that you rarely hear a gay conservative take an aggressive approach. At least for now, they're always in hiding as if they're terrified to "come out." The comments at the bottom of this article, unfortunately, are what you would expect from the most liberal.

The rest is here.  




Meadows Are Not Forever







Tuesday, March 3, 2015

"Glee" Changed Public Opinions; Benham Brothers Again; Gay Flag Burns

"Glee" Changed Public Opinions

Here's a link to an article about how Ryan Murphy thinks Glee changed public opinions. I think it's an article many of us can relate to...but only to a certain extent.

I have been told that seven years ago, before Glee and Modern Family and Transparent and Orange Is the New Black, that only 18 percent of Americans believed that a gay or nontraditional family was entitled to equal rights. Today, that number has grown to 52 percent. That is a great change, that is a great victory, shockingly in such a short amount of time, but there is more work to be done.

You can read more here.

I've been critical of Glee at times and a few of the other TV shows above because I found them to be self-indulgent. But more than that, they don't always represent all LGBT people...especially those gay men who are still closeted, still without a voice, still facing discrimination, and still living with shame. A good deal of this shame comes from the stereotypes about gay men that make it harder for everyone. But in a general sense I do think Glee did help change public opinion and did help educate the mainstream in a positive way. 

I can tell you one thing for certain. I personally face insults, homophobia, and discrimination every day of my life and we have a long way to go.

Benham Brothers Again

I once posted about these two Benham brothers when they had their HGTV show yanked because their homophobic beliefs surfaced and went public.  Since then they claim gays have been waging war against Christians...allegedly. It's hard to parse this article because it's written in such a highly subjective way.

“We had so many people from the gay community reaching out to us and one man in particular from the city of Chicago reached out,” David Benham said during a panel discussion last week. “After a little conversation back and forth, I found out he loved baseball … and I got him tickets to a Cubs game. He shot me a Facebook post and said, ‘I was not expecting that — and I’ve been thinking a lot about this. I’ve chosen to walk away from my lifestyle.’”

So much about this doesn't make sense. First, it's kind of sad to think a straight man would be shocked to find out a gay man loves baseball. Maybe the comment about walking away from his lifestyle was sarcasm...because gay isn't a lifestyle.

But this is what I mean about how far we still have to go. I'm not only insulted by the Benham brothers, but by the gay person who wrote about all this. We also need to focus a little more on finding a few more professional gay journalists and not these self-indulgent cliches.

You can read more here.

Gay Flag Burns

This story is disturbing, because it shows how innocent gay people can be subjected to hate and discrimination when they least expect it. A straight guy got drunk and set their rainbow flag afire.

It was just after midnight when Ariann and Jess were woken up by some commotion; they initially thought they were being burglarized. Jess ran to check on their two girls, and Ariann made it to a window just in time to see Mayfield’s van drive off.

Already shaken, the couple heard more noise shortly thereafter, and when they looked out the window, saw Mayfield running down the street, the flag’s flames aglow in the night.

The guy who did this claims he was so drunk he didn't know what he was doing and the gay flag wasn't something he targeted in particular. But even if that is true, tell me what gay person in the world would NOT be scared to death watching something like that happen outside their home?

You can read the rest here. 

Meadows Are Not Forever









Monday, March 2, 2015

Straight Men Secret Gay Desires; What Scares Tayte Hanson?

Straight Men Secret Gay Desires

Once again, here's some good clickbait. I don't really get it because as a gay man I don't have secret "straight" desires, not one. But here you go.

Thanks to the advent of social media sites like Reddit and Whisper, we are now privy to people’s most intimate thoughts and desires.

More and more straight men have been using these anonymous online platforms to share their deepest, darkest secrets. We’ve seen them open up about accidental visits to gay bathhouses, their love of anal play, and doing gay things while stoned. And it never ceases to fascinate, amaze, and excite to us.

You can read them here.    

Personally, I think it's a better example of how many closeted gay men and bi men there are. 

What Scares Tayte Hanson

And here's some more garbage...but it's fun garbage. It's all about what scares Tayte Hanson (if you don't know who the fuck Tayte Hanson is you're not alone).

He goes surprisingly deep, revealing not-so-secrets such as a versatile belly button (he can make it an innie or an outie) and a love for jumping from staggering heights. We also asked him about his underwear, of course. Spoiler alert: he likes to exercise in jockstraps.

And here's an example of how "surprisingly deep" Tayte Hanson can go. (That's sarcasm)

What is a smell you absolutely love? 
I love wood.

Because wood is so "surprisingly deep".

You can see a video here.  

There are no comments yet, but I have a feeling when they start popping up they'll be interesting.

The Rainbow Detective Agency
Book 2
 
 



 




Saturday, February 28, 2015

Revisiting SCOTUS Ruling and Gay Marriage; Amway Boycott; Chick-Fil-a

I'm really busy with family things this week, so here's an older post from 2012. I think it shows some of the changes we've been through.


There's been a lot written about SCOTUS and gay marriage, so this is from my inbox from Freedom to Marry:

Just moments ago, the U.S. Supreme Court set the clock ticking on the important work we need to do to secure our next wave of wins in 2013.

The Court announced that it will hear a challenge to the so-called Defense of Marriage Act, the federal law that discriminates against legally married same-sex couples, and to California's Proposition 8.
Ryan,it is urgent that we now create the climate that will embolden the Supreme Court to strike down DOMA and Prop 8 as unconstitutional. We know from the Roadmap to Victory national strategy exactly how to do that: win more states and win over more hearts and minds.
Please join us in this essential work by making a donation today:http://freedomtomarry.org/SCOTUS

These big steps in the Supreme Court cap a transformative year in which we paved the pathway for President Obama's support, led the campaign to secure a freedom to marry plank in the Democratic Party platform, and won the freedom to marry at the ballot in Maine, Maryland and Washington while defeating an anti-marriage amendment in Minnesota.

We now must turn this irrefutable momentum into more wins.

Help us make 2013 - like 2012 - a year of triumph and transformation by bringing down DOMA and Prop 8. Make a donation today and make your voice heard in the Supreme Court in the most powerful way possible - with more wins.
http://freedomtomarry.org/SCOTUS

Thanks for all you do,

Evan Wolfson
Founder and President, Freedom to Marry


I'm on the fence about boycotts, only because I'm not sure they work. But it seems to be something getting attention, so here's an e-mail I got from Fred Karger about Jane Lynch and the Amway Boycott:


I hope you can see that. Here's more:

The Amway Boycott covers all holdings of the DeVos family and are listed on: www.BoycottAmway.com They include all Amway divisions, the Orlando Magic NBA team, all 26 Fox Automotive Group Dealerships, MVP and RDV Health Clubs and all the hotels owned by the DeVos family including the Amway Grand Plaza, J W Marriott and the Marriott Courtyard all in in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

Jane Lynch and 3 Elected Officials Say “Boycott Amway”

Actress and Out Magazine “Entertainer of the Year” Jane Lynch endorsed the Amway Boycott recently. She is joined this week by South Dakota’s first openly gay elected official State Representative Joshua Boschee and Chapel Hill, North Carolina Mayor Mark Kleinschmidt and City Council Member Lee Storrow. All three signed Boycott Amway postcards addressed to Amway owner Doug DeVos.

The postcard campaign launched in September has resulted in a deluge of the bright yellow cards mailed in to DeVos, according to Amway Boycott founder and Rights Equal Rights President Fred Karger.

“Multilevel Marketing” Postcard Campaign
to Amway Owner Doug DeVos


Following the Amway model, Rights Equal Rights has expanded its Postcard Campaign by asking Amway Boycott supporters to get their friends, family members, neighbors and coworkers to send in the colorful postcards to Amway CEO Doug DeVos. Our supporters will in turn will ask their friends, family members, neighbors and co-workers to join the Boycott and take similar action. According to Karger, we have already sent in hundreds and hundreds of the bright yellow cards to Doug DeVos asking him to match his $500,000 contribution to NOM by contributing an equal amount to LGBT organizations.

“Every single day we mail a batch of our Boycott Amway postcards to Mr. DeVos. We will continue to take actions in order to bring more attention to the Boycott in 2013,” said Karger. “During California’s Prop 8 campaign we boycotted four of the largest contributors to the Yes on 8 campaign and we settled two of them when the companies gave equal amounts or more to LGBT organizations.”

“The Manchester Hotels Boycott was never settled, but owner Doug Manchester, who gave $125,000 to Yes on Prop 8, publically admitted that his Manchester Grand Hyatt in San Diego was losing $1 million per month because of the boycott. He has since sold that hotel, apologized for his contribution through a spokesman and said that he would never give money to take away same-sex marriage again.

If You Don’t Like Chick-fil-A -- You’ll Really Hate Amway

“We will be reaching out to many more organizations and individuals to join the Amway Boycott utilizing the theme, “If you didn’t like Chick-fil-A (for all of owner Dan Cathy’s big anti-LGBT contributions and statements) just wait until you hear about Amway,” said Karger.

And here's something from my inbox from the P'town film society auction:

The Provincetown Film Society Auction closes on December 9, 2012 at 11:00 PM EST.

If you've got your heart set on a special item... you still have time to win!

Check Out These Great Buys...
You can still bid on any of the special items in our
auction right up to the final seconds of this exciting event. Every tick of the clock brings us closer to the finish line. This may be your last chance to win that special item or to grab a great bargain. So don't miss out... BID NOW!

Spread the Word!
Remind your friends the end is almost here! Just
Refer your Friends so they have the chance to offer their support and get some great last-minute deals.
Don't Forget: Every bid supports the Capital Campaign for the renovation and new equipment at Waters Edge Cinema!

View All Auction Items


The Rainbow Detective Agency
Book 2

Friday, February 27, 2015

Steve Grand an Inspiration; His Kinky Gay Porn Past; The Rainbow Detective Agency by Ryan Field

Steve Grand an Inspiration

Here's a nice article about how Steve Grand helps gay people feel less lonely.

 ‘What really made a difference for me was the people that would write in and some of these people would tell me their life stories or stories of their All-American boys that got away. That made me realize this is why I did this — to connect people and to connect with people.” Grand recalls receiving thousands of letters from gay people who thanked him for them feel less alone in the world.

He really is an inspiration and a man who breaks so many barriers for other gay men, both in his age group and for all ages. 

You can read the rest here. His new album is due out on March 24th, and I'll be downloading that the first minute I can.

His Kinky Gay Porn Past

Here's a story about a guy who did gay for pay porn about twenty years ago...when he really needed the money. Before I get into this any further, I have to admit I just don't get that. I don't think it would be possible for me to do straight porn for any amount of money. Not physically possible.

But this guy did do straight porn first, and then he got into gay porn later.

 “He said he didn’t have any more work like that but if I was willing to try something else he could get me some work. I said I’d try anything, I should have clarified that. He got me a job, a one day shoot on the other side of the state he said they were eager to work with me so I drove over there.”

At first he refused doing gay porn, but then settled on doing it for $3,000. After that, he continued doing gay porn for the next year and a half. (I can't even imagine doing straight porn once, let alone for over a year.)

He stopped doing gay porn when he met a "girl" and he's been married to her or 18 years. She knows nothing about his gay porn past. And now he's wondering if he should tell her.

You can read the rest here. Frankly, I think he should keep it to himself. If he had done straight porn and he had kept that to himself no one would mind. Or, he would have told her years ago without thinking twice. Should it be any different with gay porn? I don't think so. But it usually is different...there's always shame involved.

The Rainbow Detective Agency
Book 2










Thursday, February 26, 2015

Nutella Bans "Lesbian"; Jack Falahee Won't Admit Sexuality; Meadows Are Not Forever

Nutella Bans "Lesbian"

In France, the Nutella company launched some kind of marketing campaign that allows people to customize their own jars with personal messages.

Evidently, they also decided to censor words like "Lesbian," "Muslim," and "Obese."

Internet users quickly discovered that they were not allowed to certain words in their messages, including the word 'lesbienne.' 

They then opened the source code of the page to see the full list of the banned words. 

They included a slew of insults and their spelling variations, and words related to unhealthy diets, such as 'obese,' 'diabetes,' 'fat' and controversial ingredient 'palm oil.' 

While gay and homosexual passed, 'Muslim' and 'lesbian' were forbidden. 

'Negative or insulting messages were directly removed from the field of possibilities,' Nutella said a statement.

If this is true, that's the worst kind of censorship there is. In full disclosure, I always have a jar of Nutella in the house. I won't be stocking any more after this.

You can read the rest here.  

Jack Falahee Won't Admit Sexuality

I've already posted about this actor, Jack Falahee, and how he won't say whether or not he's gay. And he's really sticking to this, with a few more additional comments.

'We don’t ask the actor playing James Bond what his sexual preference is,' he said this week on SiriusXM Progress. 'So I don’t know what it is, really, with trying to out actors who portray gay characters on television. But it is some sort of fascination in society.' 

The freshman series wraps up its season next week and Falahee's law student character of Conor Walsh and his memorable trysts with several different men have catapulted the previously unknown actor to stardom.

Being gay is not about sexual preference. That's just a small part of it. It's not a "fascination." It's about self-respect, pride, and something called equality. As a gay man who gets a kick in the face almost every single day of my life, I not only find it disingenuous of Falahee, but ignorant. He's the one who decided to play gay on TV and collect a nice big paycheck. I've never advocated forcing anyone to come out, however, under these circumstances with someone this vocal I personally think Falahee's words are an insult to every single gay person who has ever come out and suffered discrimination.

Falahee is only promoting more shame...the shame that still exists if you say you're gay. The shame that still exists if someone calls you gay and you're not. And that's what I dislike the most about him. 

You can read more here.

Meadows Are Not Forever 
 
 


Boners: Awkward Moments; Homophobic Teacher Sues; Madonna Falls on Her Ass; Amazon and Ellora's Cave

Boners: Awkward Moments

As the title suggests, this is pretty boilerplate. It's a humorous video where guys describe their most awkward boner moments.

Morning wood is one thing, but what happens when the gears down under start turning at much more unwanted moments? Things get awkward, and fast.

From sex pills to planes to sheer unexplainable bad timing, watch as these guys describe their awkward boner moments.

I remember reading once on a writer's blog that "morning wood" is cliche in erotic romance novels. And to be honest as a man I never got that. Why would something so important to men be considered cliche in sexy novels?

In any event, you can get there from here. 

Homophobic Teacher Sues

It always amazes me when I see how litigious these homophobes can be. There's now a teacher suing a New Jersey school district because they fired her after she allegedly went into a homophobic tirade...where she shouted about her religious beliefs. Yes, once again, it's all about these religious wing nuts and their hate for gay people. She's claiming they violated her right to free speech...yes, free speech.

This is what she did, of course, on Facebook:

The incident happened back in September 2011. After noticing a poster for LGBT Month hanging in the school hallway, Knox took to Facebook to express her outrage, writing

She said this:

“Why parade your unnatural immoral behaviors before the rest of us? I DO NOT HAVE TO TOLERATE ANYTHING OTHERS WISH TO DO. I DO HAVE TO LOVE AND SPEAK AND DO WHAT’S RIGHT!”

And this:

She then listed all her religious objections to the billboard, which included statements from the bible about homosexuality, calling homosexuality a sin and an act of “disobedience to God,” and calling for salvation through Mr. Jesus H. Christ.

You can read the rest of the details here. This is an interesting case to follow for two reasons. The homophobic vs free speech aspect goes without saying. But should a public school teacher be allowed to even mention anything religious in a public school? What defines hate speech?

Madonna Falls on Her Ass

This article's melodramatic title makes it appear Madonna almost died as a result of a wardrobe malfunction. You can be the judge of that yourselves.

The Living for Love hit maker was wearing a black Armani cape. The plan was for the backup dancer to pull the cape off to reveal a sparkly red getup underneath. But before doing so, Madonna was supposed to untie the strap around her neck.

Evidently the strap was too tight because when the backup grabbed the cape, he accidentally pulled Madonna down with it.

In other words, she fell on her fifty something year old ass. You can call that ageism or whatever PC term you want. But in this particular case she's well into her fifties and trying to behave like someone in their twenties and it just doesn't work. Life doesn't work that way: we all get old. There's nothing wrong with being fifty-five, and you can still look great and feel great, but you can't turn back the clock. She should be glad she didn't break a fucking hip.

Sorry if I'm not all broken up about this. There are people of all ages dying of cancer, AIDS, and suffering in all kinds of ways that none of us even want to imagine. I know this first hand. Madonna's senior citizen ass will survive this attempt at freebie publicity. 

You can read more here. 

Amazon and Ellora's Cave

Here's a link to a publishing related article that talks, in part, about how Amazon and e-books are changing and how those changes are hitting e-publishers. I honestly don't know how else to put that, because it's not a simple matter. And I think every digital only author and digital only publisher has been experiencing something similar to this for a while now.

I'm not commenting on this one because it is so complicated, because publishing and e-books are constantly changing, and because I think of Ellora's Cave as one of the digital book publishing pioneers. I have never worked with them, or had anything published with them, but I have been working with other small digital pioneers for over a decade now and I owe a great deal to them all. So I can't be objective this time.

And frankly, I still can't figure out half the shit Amazon pulls. And do they pull shit!

You can read this here. There's also mention of a legal matter between Ellora's Cave and some small time romance book reviewer in the mid-west most people never heard of, or care much about. I think it's one of those cute kitten blogs with droll elitist snark that got tired years ago...but don't quote me on that. I'm not up on my droll little bloggers. It's just interesting from a small time blogging POV.


Meadows Are Not Forever