FREE Excerpt: Gay Slut Shaming In Imperfect; Gay Man Who Gave Blood Had No Sex For One Year; Record Number of LGBT People This Year;

Record Number of LGBT People This Year

I've been predicting this was going to happen the entire time I've been blogging.

Study reveals there are now over 10 million Americans who identify as LGBT.

According to a poll done by Gallup the percentage of Americans who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender has increased from 3.5% in 2012 to 4.1% in 2016.

Gallup released the results and said: ‘These figures, drawn from the largest representative sample of LGBT Americans collected in the U.S., imply that more than an estimated 10 million adults now identify as LGBT in the U.S. today, approximately 1.75 million more compared with 2012.’

And, I predict the numbers will continue to increase. There are still many who have not been heard...yet. I know several of them personally.

You can read more here.

Gay Man Who Gave Blood Had No Sex For One Year

It's hard to imagine that this kind of thing is still happening to gay men and that these laws are still being enforced.

21-year-old Jay Franzone abstained from sex for a year to able to donate blood.

Franzone was finally able to donate blood this week after not having sex of any kind with another man for a year.

‘IT shouldn’t be a big deal that I gave blood this week, but it is. To do it, I had to give up all forms of sex for a year. The reason: I’m gay,’ he wrote in a New York Times article.

There's more here. He talks about how his straight friends can have all the sex they want, and still donate blood without anyone questioning them. It's also mentioned that HIV testing has improved significantly since these laws were enforced.


FREE Excerpt: Gay Slut Shaming In Imperfect

With these new adult gay romance novels I've been releasing lately, I've been focusing on incorporating a few small things into the story lines that we often overlook. In the book, Imperfect, I thought it was important to include some of the slut shaming that often occurs within the gay community, through the main character, Rider Evans. Of course that's not what the entire book is about...it's a romance. However, it is a huge part of the story, from a gay POV.

Here's a short Excerpt. It's from a scene where the main characters meet up again after a lengthy separation, because they're forced to work together professionally. I can't give out more because I don't want to add spoilers. However, this is just one scene of a few where they talk about this kind of slut shaming.

Rider walked over to his desk and said, "You really are looking well, Drew." His honey colored hair was shorter on the sides and longer on the top, his chest muscles rounded through the white V-neck shirt he was wearing, and he had just enough of a tan to give his skin a soft glow. It appeared as if he was beginning to grow a beard, which gave him a rugged appeal that sent a ridiculous thrill up Rider's leg.

Drew shrugged as if he didn't care and said, "You look the same as always."

"Thank you," Rider said. "You always knew how to pay the best compliments." He'd been trying not to be sarcastic, but that one was too easy to pass. In the short time they were together as a couple if Drew even noticed how Rider looked it was a novelty.

"And you were always so needy," Drew said.

"Now that's not true and you know it," Rider said. He didn't want to start an argument. He'd only been there a few minutes. However, he wasn't going to let Drew get away with that superior tone, especially now that they would be working together on a regular basis.

Drew stood up and turned to glance out the window. His faded jeans were as tight at his shirt and they hugged his slim hips so perfectly Rider felt like walking over and grabbing him.

"You always did need extra attention," Drew said. "If everyone in the room wasn't falling all over you, you worked them even harder until they did."

"Maybe that's because I never got any attention from you," Rider said. He didn't feel like explaining it to Drew, but he had changed in that respect. The older he got the less he seemed to care about what people thought.

"Well, you made up for it. I'll never forget just how much attention you were getting from the pizza delivery guy and the plumber on that afternoon."

"Why do you have to bring that up again?" Rider asked. "That's ancient history."

Drew turned and laughed in his face. "You're right. You can't help it if you have needs. The kind of needs that could never be satisfied by one man alone. It's just part of your nature."

"Don't slut shame me," Rider said.

"It's not slut shaming when you're talking about your own lover, the person you thought you were in a monogamous relationship with. That's called honesty, and it's something with which you've never been completely familiar."

He had a point and Rider knew it. When he'd seduced the plumber and the pizza guy in his underwear that afternoon he knew he was wrong, and yet he still couldn't keep from doing it. "I'm sorry. I was an idiot."

Drew walked to the other end of the window and glanced out to the parking lot. "It's all good now," he said. "There's no need to apologize. We're both adults and enough time has passed since all that happened. In a way, you actually helped me grow up and face the world as it is." He turned and looked him in the eye. "If anything, I should be thanking you for teaching me a good lesson in life. If it looks too good to be true, it probably is."

He sounded so friendly and calm Rider didn't want to ruin the moment by continuing this conversation. He had a feeling that if he said the wrong thing…which he tended to do…the conversation might devolve into a loud shouting match.

He walked over to the window where Drew was standing and extended his right hand. "Let's start fresh, right now. We're going to be working together, we both want this web site to be successful, and I think we're going to work well together. Let's shake on it, and I'll take you out to dinner tonight to talk everything over."

For a moment, Drew hesitated. When he did finally reach for Rider's hand he shook it and said, "That sounds like a good idea, a business dinner."

"Don't I at least get a hug?" Rider asked.

Drew stepped back and smiled. "Don't push your luck, pal."

Rider smiled and lifted his palms. "Okay."

"Now I have to get back to work, and you need to get set up in your office," Drew said. "If you need anything ask Dequinn. He's kind of like the receptionist, the office manager, and the one who does all the tech work around here. Sandler, who is also on staff, does some tech work, but it's mostly Dequinn."

As Rider turned to leave, he said, "Sounds good. I'll make a reservation somewhere and meet you here in your office at the end of the day."

When Rider reached the door, Drew said, "One more thing. You don't have to dress that way for work."

Rider stopped at the door and turned around. "What's wrong with the way I'm dressed?" He thought he looked great.

Drew looked him up and down and smiled. "It's just that we're more casual here on a daily basis, and you look as if you're going to the first holy communion of the child of a hipster couple. But you always were very trendy."

"Well I'm glad I left my lumberjack beard and fake man bun at home," Rider said. "I'll remember that." No one could throw shade better than Drew, but no one could reply faster than Rider.

"I'm sure you will," Drew said, and then he sat down behind his desk, went back to his keyboard, and dismissed Rider as if he'd already left the room.

When Rider was out in the reception area again, he noticed a nice looking young guy sitting at the main desk. Even though he was seated, he appeared to be taller than most men. He was dressed casually in a white button down shirt and tan jeans, and his short dark hair had a little extra style to it that was hard to explain. At a glance, he reminded Rider of a news anchor on one of the large cable news stations, but he had an edge that resembled a well-known openly gay rap singer. Rider figured this was Dequinn, so he headed over to introduce himself, wondering whether or not this unusual working arrangement with Drew would ever settle into something comfortable.

New Release

Imperfect

Amazon Link

More On Stonewall Film; Stonewall Historian Speaks Out on "Stonewall"; 24 Year Old and Gay Sugar Daddy

More On Stonewall Film

This entire topic is tricky for me because there seem to be so many varying opinions. On the one hand there are LGBT people who claim Hollywood white-washed gay history, and on the other some claim they can't wait to see it because it's a gay film about Stonewall. In other words, they're excited about it because it's a gay film and they don't care whether or not it's accurate. I felt that way, too, at first...excited about it. 

This doesn't seem to be disappearing, which I thought it would. 

In any event, here's an article with more scathing reviews on Stonewall, the film. 

Rather than choose something debatable, the filmmakers created something definitively untrue. Rather than exploring the conflicting stories of what sparked the riot (was it Marsha P. Johnson’s shot glass, a high heel, a brick, or what?), which could have made for a fascinating formal exercise, they just credited the white guy. Rather than really examine Stonewall, a place obviously brimming with unheard stories of extreme living, Emmerich and company decided to center their narrative on a dude who drops by the bar a few times while floating through the city (only to settle uptown at Columbia when the summer ends). Imagine, just one time, an ensemble led by a character who isn’t white and “straight-acting.” Imagine people of color being used for more than just support.

You can read several more just like this, here.  

Frankly, at this point I'm more inclined to trust my fellow gay journalists, activists, and well informed reviewers and I won't be running to see Stonewall any time soon. And I rarely base my decision on reviewers.

If anyone does happen to see the film and they'd like to leave their well informed short review, feel free to comment. I would love to hear your thoughts, no matter what they are. I always post anon comments, too.

Stonewall Historian Speaks Out on "Stonewall"

In more Stonewall movie related news, a Stonewall historian is now speaking out.

And it was very disappointing to me to see the death and funeral of Judy Garland used yet again as part of an explanation for the Stonewall uprising. That has been thoroughly discredited by historical research. And this film is no credit to the history it purports to portray.”

You can read the whole thing here.

Seriously. How much more do you need to know? 

24 Year Old and Gay Sugar Daddy

Moving on to something much lighter, here's an article about a 24 year old straight guy and his rich sugar daddy. The 24 year old is open and honest about stating he's only in it for the money. He's also going to inherit the money when the older one is dead.

Do you have sex with each other?
Yes, we have sex.
Do you engage in one night stands with women?
Yeah, I can still hook up with women just so long as I don’t bring any home with me. So either at their place or a hotel or something.
What’s the point of getting married without a romantic connection?
You’d have to ask him I guess, since I’d ask what’s the point of a romantic connection in the first place. FWIW I kind of fake one for him, although he knows I’m faking.
Are you the top or bottom?
Usually I bottom but sometimes he wants me to fuck him.

No comment from me. You can read the rest here. 

 

New Release 

When A Man Loves A Man

Monk Touches Trans Woman's Breast; Jussie Smollett Outed; Meadows Are Not Forever M/M Romance

Monk Touches Trans Woman's Breast

This is unusual because it's a topic that's sparked a debate in some circles over gender, one most of us haven't seen before.

A monk in Thailand touched a woman's breasts, a photo was taken that went viral, and it set off a firestorm because Buddhist monks are never allowed physical contact with the opposite sex.

But the story took an unexpected twist Sunday (1 March) when the woman in the photo, only identified as Thanradaporn, told the Morning News TV show that she was a pre-op transgender woman.

'I'm a transgender who has not had a gender change operation. My chest looks bigger than usual because I have been taking birth control pills,' she said.

You can read more here. It's really something that seems so innocent and yet somehow became a huge event that has sparked a debate over whether or not the trans woman in question is male, female, or third sex. 

Jussie Smollett Outed

This is something you don't see often. One of Smollett's co-stars in Empire, Malik Yoba, recently outed Smollett. He claims Smollett is gay to the point of being an activist in the LGBT community.

I don't follow Empire, but it's interesting to note that Smollett plays a gay character, Jumal, but hasn't said anything about his own sexuality in real life. 

'Jussie, he is gay, and he’s very committed to issues around the LGBT community. He and I have a very close relationship,' Yoba tells Black Film.

But Smollett isn't saying.

'I am not willing to confirm or deny anything,' he said in a recent interview with Sway in the Morning.

'I live my life…if anyone is looking to put me in a box, then that’s not going to happen. But if you really want to know about me, just watch, because I don’t hide anything. I just don’t choose to talk about my personal life.'

See, that's the part that bothers me. It's not about his personal life. I don't want to know about his sex life, what he eats for dinner, or what kind of car he drives. I don't care how he does anal sex, if he's a top or a bottom. That's personal. Being gay is NOT about keeping something hidden in your personal life. Being gay is just being who you are, without shame and with dignity. And every single time I hear this weak excuse I want to grab something and kick it. It's an insult to me, and to everyone else out there who just says, "Yes, I'm gay." And that's all we really need to know.

The rest is here.  Frankly, in this particular circumstance, I'm glad he was outed. I wouldn't say that in other more sensitive circumstances. But the dude is playing gay, getting paid a lot of money to pretend to be gay, and he doesn't want to admit he is gay in real life? That's WTF-ery that sends mixed messages to younger gay men still struggling with their identities.

Meadows Are Not Forever

Smashwords

 

 

FREE Gay Excerpt; Gay Dancing on TV; Gay Twins Come out; Gay Bath Houses Going Extinct; Cage James by Ryan Field

Gay Dancing on TV

This is interesting to me because I'm in the middle of working on a book where the topic of country western music comes up. In short, the characters talk about how there have never been any gay songs in any genre (not just country western), especially gay love songs. So my main character decides to parody the most popular country western songs by replacing feminine names and pronouns with masculine. Why not? It's parody, it's something gay people can enjoy for a change, and there's no reason why we shouldn't have our own music, too. If a song can be titled "When a Man Loves a Woman," it can also be titled, "When a Man Loves a Man." I know how hard Steve Grand has worked to raise money and promote his brand of gay country music. But not one big record company as far as I know has offered to take him on and fund him.

I do, however, think this will change and we will be listening to more gay music...where gay singers actually sing about loving men, not women...or the same for gay women singing love songs.

In any event, this article discusses a gay dance scene on the TV show, So You Think You Can Dance. It's allegedly the first gay dance routine in all the years this show has been on the air. Is it the first time a gay guy has danced? I highly doubt that. It's just the first time two gay men have danced together.

 Although nothing was said about it on the air, Fox's So You Think You Can Dance on Wednesday (27 August) featured what is believed to be the first romantic same-sex routines in its 11-year history.

You can read the rest here, with images.

Gay Twins Come Out

This article talks about the gay gene and how being gay runs in families. I tend to agree with that. I have a gay brother and at least one gay nephew that I know about as if right now. I have a feeling there are more.

In any event, there is another set of twins making headlines lately, and mainly because they're gay twins.

The adorable 21-year-old Monastero (fraternal) twins are the latest gay twins to pop on our radar, appearing together in their very first YouTube video to explain how they came out to one another.

 

In it, they say that even though they knew they were gay at age four, they only got around to telling each other this year.

 

If you think that sounds a little unbelievable, think again. I didn't know my brother was gay until the night I bumped into him in a gay nightclub about a year before I met Tony. We were both in our early twenties. Didn't have a clue until that night.

 

You can read the rest of the article here, where there are photos of these guys.

 

Gay Bath Houses Going Extinct

I think I've mentioned before that I've never actually been to a bathhouse, but I've always been curious about them. I think they were the most popular a generation before me, back in the 1960's and 70's. I've always heard stories from older friends about how they used to go listen to Bette Midler singing in the gay bathhouses in New York before her career took off...the same for Barry Manilow. I think there are other entertainers of that generation who also got started in the bigger bathhouses.

But I digress. This article is talking about gay bathhouses becoming extinct. It's interesting to post this right after a post about two gay men dancing on TV, because it shows how the times are changing. I'm not sure gay bathhouses will ever become completely extinct in our lifetimes, but at one time gay bars and bathhouses were the only places men could go to meet other men like themselves. It wasn't always just about the sex, at least that's what I've been told anyway.

Giovanni’s Room might be in the clear, but another group of gay institutions is in serious trouble. More and more bathhouses are switching off their “Open 24 Hours” signs and closing their steam room doors for good.

“The acceptance of gays has changed the whole world,” 75-year-old Dennis Holding, who own a small bathhouse Miami told the AP. “It’s taken away the need to sneak into back-alley places … Bathhouses were like dirty bookstores and parks: a venue to meet people. Today, you can go to the supermarket.”

He's right about that. Last evening Tony and I stopped at the supermarket to pick up a prescription for the dog. I waited up front in the car while he went in. And while I waited there were more gay men coming and going than I could count. How did I know? Trust me, they let me know.

You can read more here.

FREE Gay Excerpt: Cage James by Ryan Field

Here's a free excerpt from Cage James. I'm posting the g-rated parts here on google blogger, but you'll have to click the link to go to my Word Press blog to finish the excerpt because it's NSFW. Once again, these excerpts are in raw version, and subject to edits. You can purchase the book here, on Amazon. Or other places where e-books are sold, like Smashwords and allromanceebooks.com

Rick noticed the short black robe and said, "This is where you live?"

Cage stepped aside and said, "Home sweet home, man.  Come in and I'll show you around."

Rick stepped into the main hall and looked around slowly.  The floors were black and white marble, the white walls covered with antique paintings in gilded frames, and the chandelier had crystals in some places the size of dessert plates.  It was probably the most formal part of the house, other than the grand ballroom.

Cage tightened the bathrobe and said, "Sorry I didn't get a chance to get dressed.  I just took a shower and I didn't want you to wait too long."  He was starting to get those intense urges he always got around big strong men like Rick.  He walked over to him slowly and ran his fingertips up and down Rick's bicep.  "Can I get you anything?"

Rick turned and smiled.  "How about the money?"

Cage squeezed his bicep this time and said, "I told you I can give you some tonight, and I'll get you the rest very soon.  I'm getting married and I'll have all the money I want then."

Rick reached out and ran his large hand across a marble top console to his right.  "You're getting married?"

Cage shrugged.  "I might as well.  Guys like me don't have that many choices."  He'd once met a woman who told him he had many options.  He'd been sleeping with her husband on the down low for money and she'd found his address at the time in her husband's coat pocket. Cage laughed in her face, mentioned her husband had a nice dick, and told her he had as many options as she did.  Last he'd heard, she was still married to the cheating prick and the cheating prick was screwing around with another young guy.

Rick looked at Cage's legs and said, "Are we alone now?"

You can read the rest of it here...

Cosmo Bad BDSM Tips; Be a Better Bottom; Top & Bottom Label; Small Town Romance Writer by Ryan Field

Cosmo Bad BDSM Tips

One thing I find interesting about this online post at Jezebel is that while it slams Cosmo's bad BDSM tips it mentions nothing about the bad BDSM in the Fifty Shades of Grey novel by E. L. James. This leads me to believe the author of the Jezebel post knows little about FSoG, the novel, or that one of the biggest complaints from critics was that FSoG didn't portray BDSM in a way that most who are serious about the lifestyle found plausible. I've posted about all this before, here, multiple times with the book I was in, Fifty Writers on Fifty Shades of Grey.  

But in spite of all this, the post does redeem itself by calling attention to this stupid Cosmo article about BDSM:

But I've got to tell you: Cosmo's BDSM tips make Fifty Shades of Grey look like The Story of O.

The post is actually amusing, especially this one. First is the Cosmo tip...

7. "As you're riding him, clamp down on his earlobes with your fingers, and pull on them to rock yourself forward and backward."

Pro-tip: if you're new to this game, stick with the sturdy body parts — like butts and chests — and be a little more delicate if you're going for the ears, eyes, or testicles. That stuff's not off-limits (in theory), but given that you may already be holding a fork in this scenario, it seems wise to err on the side of caution.

 

You can read the rest here. I think posts like this prove several things. Few people really understand the BDSM lifestyle and really don't care to learn more about it. And, Cosmo might be one reason why the magazine publishing is a dying industry.

 

 Be a Better Bottom

 

Who can really say what makes a person a better bottom? But this article I'm linking to now doesn't give bad advice by any means. It comes from first hand experience, and it's well presented.

 

This one piece of advice seems to be something on which all good bottoms agree:

 

Basically douching is the process of cleaning out your insides. Usually it involves some kind of variation on a squirt bottle or hose inserted in to the anus.

 

I've heard turkey basters work, too, if you're in a pinch. Just DON'T put it back in the kitchen when you're finished.

 

This info about position can be helpful:

 

Starting by sitting on top of him is a good way to begin if you are having trouble relaxing or experiencing pain. If you are on top you can control the angle and depth until you have loosened up enough to change positions.

 

Doing all "this" can be intimidating sometimes, especially if you're not experienced. And articles like this one help ease a lot of the anxiety.

 

You can read the rest here.

 

Top & Bottom Label

 

This next link seems to suggest that gay dating has evolved into two distinct categories. It's frank, it's accurate, and it goes beyond a lot of the PC nonsense we read out there about the dynamics in gay relationships. There are, indeed, a few fundamental aspects that just can't be ignored when two gay men get together...at least in a physical sense.  

 

“I’ll be online,” says Jason, 33, a financial consultant, “chatting with some guy, we’ll be getting along really well, and then I’ll say I’m a bottom and he’ll say, ‘Me too. Okay. Good-bye,’ and sign off.”

 

Frankly, from what I do recall about dating, this type of reaction happened ten, twenty, or forty years ago as much as it continues to happen today. In spite of what you might read in other places, it's hard to get two bottoms to take the next step because both know it's going to be futile in the end. I think it's just important to be honest about it in the beginning, because it's not always easy to tell at a glance.  

 

I've heard this before, too.

 

Though many men despise being labeled, offering up their versatility as a selling point, like a six-figure income or well-defined lats, others say a versatile’s just a bottom in denial. “New York is a bottom town,” says Jason. “When you’re on manhunt.net and the profile says ‘versatile,’ you know that guy’s a bottom. It means he will top but doesn’t like to. I’m a bottom, and my profile says versatile.”

 

You can read the rest here. I think the subject and content is timeless.

 

 

 

 

Small Town Romance Writer

 

 

by Ryan Field

 

 

Amazon Link