This book was just re-released by Riverdale Avenue Books, and just in time for the Broadway play Pretty Woman. However, this is the gay erotic romance version, with all the parody, and even more erotic romance than usual. At the time I wrote it that way, as a parody, on purpose. I've toned down my other books little since this was written, but frankly I think this book works better with more sex than less. And that's not always the case. If you read my posts regularly you'll see that most of the story lines I've done in the past two years or so have been more PG rated romances. But this one was different for some reason. It was also written in 2008 and we decided not to update certain things. We wanted to keep the time frame authentic.Here's the Amazon Link. It's always been one of those books that people either loved or hated. And that's fine. There's a lot of sex in this book (but not in the excerpt below) and not everyone likes sex.
Chapter
Four
It
took Roland more than an hour to get dressed for the dinner. He spent an
inordinate amount of time fussing in the bathroom with his short brown hair. It
was thick and wiry, and the little turned-up wave above his forehead wasn't
easy to manage. He took time to apply a light bronzer (from his own company) to
hide any signs of aging. He sighed when he buttoned the trousers of his black
formal: They were about two inches too loose now. He hadn’t worn them in more
than a year and forgot about the weight he lost since his break-up with
Kenneth. Thankfully, the black jacket still fit perfectly.
Josh
lay in bed watching a ballgame on TV until ten minutes before they had to
leave. Then he got up, ran his fingers through his hair a few times, and put on
the new black Versace Russell had left hanging in the kitchen. Roland’s
eyebrows went up as he watched all this from a mirror in the bathroom. The
pants went up over Josh’s hairy muscular legs perfectly, and the shirt hugged
his V-shaped torso as though it had been sewn to his body. He made it all seem
effortless: just button the shirt and zip the pants. He didn’t even use a
mirror to knot his black tie. In less than five minutes, Josh stood in the
bathroom doorway with his hands in his pants pockets as if he’d just stepped
out of a fashion magazine, asking Roland if he was ready.
Roland
turned to face him. “Damn,” Josh said. “You look really good.” His blue eyes
scanned Roland’s body. “I’m not just saying that. You really look fantastic.”
Roland
thought his face looked a little puffy and was worried that the wave above his
forehead was too spiky. But his biggest concern was that he might be mistaken
for Josh’s father rather than his date. “Thank you,” Roland said. “You look
good, too.” In fact, Josh looked so good Roland felt the urge to unzip his
pants and suck him off right there on the bathroom floor.
“Where
are we going tonight?” Josh asked. He leaned into the doorjamb, kicking the
marble tile with the tip of his shoe.
“A
place called The Park Side,” Roland said, taking one last look in the mirror to
make sure he hadn't applied too much bronzer. “C’mon. I’ll race you downstairs.”
Russell
stood in the street next to the car as Josh and Roland came outside. He had his
signature somber expression on his face: that puckered, pinched look that
implied he might have been weaned on a sour pickle. His gray eyes sparkled when
he saw Roland jogging happily down the front steps and smiled for the first
time since Josh had been there. “It’s so good to see you going out, Roland,”
Russell said. “It’s good to have you back to normal and home again where you
belong.” He shot a quick looked at Josh, who was brushing a small piece of lint
from the back of Roland’s jacket.
Roland
patted the old man on the back. “It’s good to be home, Russell.”
Josh
rushed out on the street, stepped in front of Russell, and opened the car door
for Roland. Russell stepped back and rubbed his jaw a few times, seemingly
surprised by Josh’s chivalry.
Roland
fumbled with the ignition a few times before he started the Bentley's engine.
He looked sheepishly at Josh. “I’m not familiar with this car,” he explained. “I’ve
only driven it twice.”
He
looked up at Russell. “Where are the lights again?”
Josh’s
eyes widened and he checked to be sure his seatbelt was fastened. “Got it,”
Roland said, and slipped the Bentley into gear. He hit the gas pedal so hard
Josh's head hit the back of the seat. The tires screeched and a man walking
down the street jumped up on someone's front steps. Roland smiled, but he also
leaned forward over the steering wheel. He gripped the wheel so tightly his
knuckles turned white. When they came to a stop sign at the end of the street,
his foot hit the brake pedal with too much force. Josh reached out and pressed
his palms against the dashboard.
“Dude,”
Josh said, “When was the last time you drove a car?”
“Don’t
worry,” Roland said, “I’m a great driver. I learned everything I know from
Russell.”
“I
was afraid of that,” Josh said, remembering their shopping trip.
Roland
stepped on the gas and pulled out onto the avenue with another loud screech. “This
place is on the Upper West Side. I think we’ll go through the park instead of
taking the Henry Hudson. It’s more scenic.”
The
men traveled through the city at top speed. Josh held the seat and pressed his
feet to the floor. Unlike Russell, who tended to keep a constant pace when he
drove, Roland had a habit of repeatedly stepping on the gas pedal and then
releasing it so it felt like the car was jerking forward all the time. He also
had a tendency to lean to the left side of the road, which made approaching
cars swerve to the right. When people walking saw him approach, they jumped
back and hid behind parked cars. Roland weaved in and out of lanes, came close
to side-swiping buses, and hit every pothole and manhole cover between the West
Village and the Upper West Side. When they crossed through the park and rounded
a curve, he drove so fast the back end of the car fishtailed. By the time they
reached Central Park West, Josh’s eyes were closed and he was holding the door
handle with both hands.
Park
Side did not have a park-side setting at all. There were no trees or benches or
duck ponds, and there wasn't a blade of grass to be found. The entire place was
a tribute to concrete. It was actually just an old parking garage that had been
converted into a large, upscale restaurant. When Roland pulled up to the valet,
Josh asked, “Are you sure this is the right place?” He took a deep breath and
smoothed out his slacks.
“I’m
sure,” Roland said. It's not The Plaza, but I think you’ll like it.”
Though
Roland had traveled the world for many internationally known charities, his
true passion remained with the Ashley Foundation. It didn’t have the celebrity
appeal that made headlines all the time, and it didn’t attract heavy
publicity-seekers; but Roland helped start the organization more than 20 years
earlier, back in the days when very few people were willing to acknowledge or
help men and women with HIV/AIDS. Over the years, Roland had prepared food in
hot kitchens, organized free counseling, devoted his time to fundraisers and
donated a great deal of his own money.
The
most recent project, one that almost consumed him, was to make sure men and
women with HIV/AIDS had access to anti retro-viral drugs. Without insurance,
the cost of these drugs could run well over $3,000 a month. Back in the early
days, the Foundation provided assistance and improved the quality of life for
those dying AIDS victims. But the organization had evolved, and now also
focused on helping people stay alive with the proper medications.
The
interior of Park Side was as stark as the exterior. Concrete walls were layered
into sections, dividing bar areas from eating areas and banquet rooms from
dancing rooms. The floors were solid concrete. Roland led Josh through the
dimly lit main space and up two flights of concrete stairs, where a sign
outside a double door read, “The Ashley Foundation.”
People
flocked to Roland the moment he stepped inside the room. He took a deep breath
and smiled, feeling shaky. He hadn't been to any events since he and Kenneth
broke up. Josh stepped aside while the men shook Roland's hand and patted him
on the back. Women in designer dresses kissed him on the cheek and told him how
wonderful it was to see him again. Roland smiled awkwardly, repeatedly looking
at Josh and shrugging his shoulders. Josh smiled and waved, and Roland reached
out for his hand and pulled him closer. He didn't want to be alone. Roland was
about to introduce Josh to the new treasurer of the foundation when a deep,
loud voice shouted from behind: “Doll, there you are.”
Kenneth
grabbed Roland from behind and hugged him. He turned his back to Josh and said,
“I was worried you wouldn’t show up tonight, Doll.” He was chewing gum because
he wasn't allowed to smoke at the gala. His black hair was puffier than usual,
and he’d had his eyebrows tweezed and shaped into thin, high arches. His new
lover stood silently off to the side, sipping a martini. His tuxedo had that
rented look— wrinkled and too long in the sleeves—and his hair was long and
shaggy.
“I
wouldn’t miss anything for this foundation,” Roland said, nodding to Kenneth’s
lover. The lover didn’t look very intelligent up close. He had a scruffy, sexy
appeal (probably a big dick, too), but it was the kind of appeal you might
settle for at the end of the night when there was no one better in the bar.
Roland clenched his teeth, wondering yet again what Kenneth saw in him.
Josh
smiled and tapped Kenneth on the back. “It’s nice to see you again.” He wasn’t
going to be ignored completely.
Kenneth
turned his head and looked into Josh’s eyes. “Do I know you?” It was a bitchy
thing to say: When you met a guy like Josh, you didn’t forget him.
Roland
sighed. “This is Josh,” he said. “You met him the other night while we were
walking down Bleecker Street.” He knew Kenneth well enough to know when he was
faking. His voice took on a sing-song tone, and he became more outrageously
affected than usual.
“That’s
right. How could I forget?” No sooner had the words left his lips than Kenneth
turned his back on Josh again and put his arm through Roland’s. “Come with me,”
he said. “There is someone who is dying to see you on the other side of
the room.”
Roland
looked quickly at Josh. “Go on,” Josh said, smiling. “I’m fine. I'll get a
drink and wait here near the table. Can I get you anything?”
“A
very large martini,” Roland said over his shoulder as Kenneth dragged him
across the room.
The
two couples were seated at the same table. Whenever Josh opened his mouth to
speak, Kenneth interrupted. If Josh came within an inch of Roland, Kenneth was
there to sweep Roland away to another corner of the room. Marty, Kenneth’s new
lover, just sat at the table looking at his watch and downing one martini after
another. Josh tried to be friendly and get to know him better, but the guy only
answered with shrugs and grunts.
The
food was bland, the room too noisy, and the chairs too small for a man as large
as Josh. The only person Josh knew besides Roland was an older man who had hired
Josh for a massage with a happy ending a year earlier. He followed Josh to the
bathroom and handed him a business card. “My back has been acting up lately,”
he said. Josh smiled and put the card in his pocket.
The
highlight of the night was when Roland stood and gave a small speech. He was
the last one left from the original group that had started the Foundation. He
was the only one who hadn’t been HIV positive; the others were all gone now. He
took a deep breath and sighed, remembering all the people he had lost over the
years. The entire room went silent. People sat up straight and stared at him
with shimmering eyes. A man sitting across from Josh turned to his wife and
whispered, “He could run for President. He reminds me of John F. Kennedy.” The
wife responded, “But much better-looking.”
Josh
stared at the way Roland moved his hands and the way his eyes looked out over
the crowd so effortlessly. He spoke with passion about his goals for the Ashley
Foundation, and thanked everyone who supported it over the years. Just before
the end of the speech, Roland looked over and winked in Josh’s direction. He
may have been smiling at the crowd when they stood to give him a standing
ovation, but the only thing he was thinking about was Josh's dick.
After
the final speaker of the night, a little before midnight, Roland leaned into
Josh.
“Let’s
go,” he hissed.
Kenneth
saw them stand and got up from his chair. “You’re not leaving now, are you,
Doll?” His throaty voice was slurred; he’d been sucking down martinis all
night. He tried to come around to the other side of the table, but his big feet
got tangled in the chair. Kenneth fell into Marty’s shoulder.
Josh
laughed. “What’s wrong, Doll. Too many olives?” It came out too fast, as
if he’d been waiting for Kenneth to stumble all night.
Roland’s
eyes popped. “It’s been a long day,” he said.
“But
I thought we could all go out somewhere afterward, Doll,” Kenneth
said. Josh put his arm around Roland’s waist and pulled him closer. Roland
leaned into Josh’s side, placed his palm on his chest, and said, “We really
have to go. We’ll see you later in the week, at the black tie bingo event in
Brooklyn Heights.”
They
left without hugging Kenneth; but Josh blew him a kiss. Roland waved good-bye
to a few people he knew and moved quickly through the building. He’d donated a
great deal of money, given his speech, and smiled all night; now it was time to
get Josh into bed.
Josh
and Roland waited for the car in front of the building. “You must be tired from
all this,” Josh said. “I don’t mind driving.” His hands were in his pockets and
he bounced on the balls of his feet while looking at the ground.
“I’m
okay,” Roland said. “I don’t mind driving.”
Josh
smiled and took Roland’s hand. “Man, please let me drive. I don’t know if I can
survive another trip downtown with you behind the wheel.”
When
the valet brought the car around and gave Roland the key, he handed it over to
Josh. “Let’s go back through the park,” he said. “And I think you’d better put
the top up and turn on the air conditioning.” The formal suit made his body
itch, and small beads of perspiration dotted his hairline. But that wasn’t the
only reason he wanted the top up.
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