I'll admit a lot has changed for gay men in the past decade. There's been a great deal of assimilation thanks to TV shows like Modern Family and aggressive gay personalities like Neil Patrick Harris who will do anything for attention and money. The gay bar is practically dead, and the gay ghetto is a place where only people over a certain age go to live...and that's even changing. And there's nothing wrong with all of this, not by a long shot. However, the one thing that hasn't changed is that gay men cruise, they still pick up tricks, they still have one night stands, and they take off as soon as the sex is over. Thank you very much; I'll call you sometime.
This article talks about how to make a graceful exit after one of those one night stands with a trick you hardly remember. In some cases I would imagine it's the old one hour stand.
Ah, the blacked-out one night stand — a rite of passage for any self-disrespecting gay man with a penchant for destructive behavior. It’s the kind of story that kills it in the dorm cafeteria between rounds of everlasting pizza dipped in ranch, but as you get older and the story stays the same, it starts to sound a lot less cute.
There's more here, with a video from Go-Go Boy Interrupted. I thought it was funny and it's refreshing to see things like this that break the stereotypes everyone's always seen on TV shows like Sex and the City. It's also refreshing to see more gay men being represented in different ways.
Gay Men and Straight Women Friends Debacle
I want to begin this part of the post by stating I've always had many different types of friends. Straight women and straight men, lesbians and gay men. My friends vary in age, too. And to be honest, like most gay men, I never gave this next topic much thought. But when I saw this post today I couldn't just ignore it. I even left my own comment at the bottom and I rarely ever do that. It just bothered me so much because it's so wrong on so many levels. It's not only insulting to women and gay men, it perpetuates the worst stereotypes for both.
First, the title of the post reads this way: Why Gay Men and Straight Women Make The Best of Friends: 4 Great Reasons. The title alone screams UGH! And then the article goes into why, according to this guy, gay men and straight women are best friends.
Get this crap:
You see, the trusted "gay best friend" helps offset the frustration of navigating a world of bitchy girls and bozo boys, and of course we empathize with your raging, mood-swingy hormones, too. (Well, everything except those menstrual cycles. We’re not quite sure what to do with those even though we have our own version of them). So, why is a gay guy a great friend to have around? For several reasons:
We Admire and Adore You
Let’s start with a confession ... we gay men/boys dig you girls way more then we let on. We’re actually kind of jealous of you. Not because you get all the great fashion. Our jealousy comes from the fact that your feminine energy has a way of making the male species become putty in your hands. True, we can do that, too, just not as well as you can. And, we watch you a lot. We’re dying to learn all your tricks for manipulating guys into doing anything you want. (Of course, let’s be truthful girls, manipulation shouldn’t be something we’re proud of unless it means manipulating a better deal on a pair of shoes … right?)
I've read a lot of douchebaggery and WTF-ery in my day. I've seen more than my fair share of insulting discussions about gay men on book blogs that focus on romance. But this one makes the top ten of all time. "Raging, mood-swingy hormones?" "We're dying to learn all your tricks" And that's just a tip of what this douchecanoe, Rick Clemons, wrote on the topic of gay men and straight women.
I suggest you read it all just for the sake of seeing how the wrong people get pubbed over at Huff Po sometimes. I just hope younger gay men don't take any of this seriously. They make us all look like a freak show. I could post pages about how wrong this is, and talk about how it insults women and promotes passive aggressive homophobia by objectifying gay men and turning them into pet poodles. But when I read the other comments I could see that sometimes it's just best to keep it all plain and simple...here's one comment:
Wrong. Sorry, just wrong on so many levels.
Now if you'll excuse me I have to run over to my best girlfriend's house to braid her hair while we talk about Debbie Macomber books and cry. NOT
Top Jock This Year
This article is commenting on how gays are making headway in sports and equality...even though Michael Sam is still having his issues. There's a list of the most popular who made headlines. And you can vote for whomever your personal favorite might be. I'm leaning toward a few I won't mention aloud. But one of them has always been someone I admired...Billy Bean.
Is it former major league outfielder Billy Bean, who was appointed by Major League Baseball this year to level the playing field for gay players, baseball personnel and fans?
Is it Chris Kluwe, the non-gay punter and advocate who exposed the homophobia of his former team, the Minnesota Vikings?
The courageous Michael Sam, the first openly gay player drafted by the NFL?
Here's a link to the article, where there's another link to vote. I think you can vote every day until 11/2/14.
Ring My Bells by Ryan Field
.99 Gay E-book