Thursday, January 30, 2014

Kirk Cameron on Gay Marriage; Gay Men and Lesbians and Tyler Curry

Kirk Cameron on Gay Marriage

Former childhood sitcom star, Kirk Cameron, recently commented on facebook about how the Grammy Awards glorified gay marriage and how it was an "assault on the traditional family."

The post was, undoubtedly, a means of self-promotion for the 43-year-old's newest flick, "Mercy Rule," which co-stars his wife and is apparently about "family, faith and baseball." Self-promotion drenched in homophobia, that is.

Cameron was not the only one to voice his condemnation of the Grammys' mass wedding. Other conservatives took to Twitter, freaking out over the same-sex marriages taking place on live primetime television.

You can read Cameron's full FB update here, and also a few other comments from people who didn't find him enlightening or relevant.

Once again I'd like to state I have no issues with Cameron's movie, his self-indulgence, or his blatant self-promotion at my expense and the expense of millions of other gay people around the world. And that's more than he can say about my recent marriage to Tony.

But I wish him luck. Because even as I write this post the "traditional" family is changing and evolving constantly. Men are staying home and women are going out to work. People are divorcing and re-marrying and now ex-wives and ex-husbands are dealing with each other as family on a daily basis with 50/50 custody, and so are their new spouses.

It must be terrible to be Cameron and to be so unwilling to accept natural changes in society.

Gay Men and Lesbians

In this next Huff Po article by someone I've never heard of, Tyler Curry, it gets into this so-called vast ocean between gay men and lesbians, as if all gay men and all lesbians never come together. First, I think this is just another example of how Huff Po seems to give the wrong people a platform. Second, even though Curry thinks this is the truth I don't and I'm also talking from experience...first hand experience.

It's not because lesbians prefer acoustic rock, and gay men require the thumping beat of a disco queen. Nor is it because there is any real issue of substance that keeps our brunch tables mutually exclusive. Simply, gay men and lesbians feel isolated from one another because we are two completely different animals who are forced to share the same cage.

When I evaluate my close circle of friends and allies, I'm ashamed to say it's hard to think of one lesbian who I can call when I need her. Sure, I know many wonderful gay women who I would love to ring up for a coffee date or share cocktails and laughs, but for some reason, there's a quiet division that has kept these platonic boy-girl dates from happening.

Before I get into anything else, I'd like to comment that when Tony was hospitalized and I needed friends and support my two best lesbian friends, Sue and Joanne, were there for me. They even asked if I needed money because they knew I probably hadn't even thought about going to the bank. I didn't need anything but their emotional support and they gave it to me willingly.

With that said, I think Curry's post comes from a place of immaturity and from the mind set of a younger gay man who is only concerned about what shirt he's going to wear to the disco next Saturday night. And that's about as simple and plain as it gets, and not all that unusual. I don't think he knows what the fuck he's talking about because he hasn't experienced enough of life yet to know the difference between what's right and what's wrong. I have known many lesbians in my life, we've always been close, and we've never actually experienced this vast "ocean" between us. Of course there are cultural differences. I'm not saying there aren't. But to put up a post like that in public makes me wonder how silly Curry is going to feel about ten years from now after he's experienced a little life in a general sense.

You can read more here.

He does save himself at the end with this comment:

Fortunately, as the gay community continues to develop, and our identities feel more defined, we just might discover there is no better friend a person can have than his or her twin brother or sister.

I just wish he wouldn't include me in that statement because I have evolved, and so have many gay men and lesbians I know. I think what he should have written is that as he and his friends continue to develop, etc...

One more reason why it's important to make broad generalizations with care. And also one more example of how different the LGBTI community can be. I think there would be a larger ocean between Curry and me as gay men.

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