Saturday, December 14, 2013

Eric Arvin/T.J. Klune Support; Facebook Celebrates Gay Rights

Eric Arvin/T.J. Klune Support

I don't normally post many personal things here, but for those who read and write gay romance, and follow a lot of what happens on social media within the community, you probably already know about the serious health situation with Eric Arvin. So far, from what I've read, Arvin has been intubated (placed on a ventilator) and they are talking about surgery. I don't know more than that, other than this is very serious. I know from personal experience with Tony they don't intubate you and put you in ICU unless it's serious. There's really no way to describe what it's like when you're going through something like this with a spouse or life partner. And when you're younger it's even harder, trust me.

Klune did a youtube video thanking people for their support. And when I watched this it was like going back to 2007 when Tony was intubated, almost died, and spent four months in ICU in Doylestown Hospital with a deadly strain of pneumonia. I posted about this before, but the impact of seeing someone else go through something similar is strong. It's the first time I've seen anything like this since 2007 when I went through it. Things like this change you forever. And when I saw the video Klune made I think I know what I must have looked like back then. Shock. You also find out fast who your friends are. You'd be amazed at how many people do a disappearing act. The week Tony was admitted to the hospital New Hope was having a gay pride event. We found out fast how many "friends" were more interested in gay pride than they were in whether or not Tony lived or died. Those who supported us emotionally will be friends until we die. Those who disappeared were weeded from our lives.

In any event, there's a support fund for Arvin and Klune to help offset medical expenses here. So far the fund has raised 22,000 dollars. Tony and I were lucky enough to have health insurance that covered his entire hospitalization. This was a huge fear of mine at the time. But to give you an example of how expensive it is to go through a serious illness these days Tony's final expense was two million dollars. That figure still blows me away.

Facebook Celebrates Gay Rights

It's nice to see something positive happening around the world with regard to the LGBTI community for a change. For the past few weeks most of what's been happening seems to involve hate and discrimination in one form or another.

But for Facebook, it’s time to celebrate the many good things that have happened to the LGBTI community this year. Looking back in the 2013 in review video, they remember the most amazing and memorable events that have happened this year.

You can read more here.

3 comments:

mary gresham said...

Ryan, when I first saw the link to the fundraiser about midnight, approximately 5 hours after it had started, it had already met and exceeded the goal. I was totally blown away by the support these two very sweet men have received, but not really surprised because I've seen how the Facebook family have come together in my own experience, just not quite as broadly as with TJ and Eric. And now tonight, 24 hours after the start of the fundraiser, the amount that had been raised is unbelievable and it shows no sign of slowing down because every time I check it, there's more.
I saw them in Albuquerque, but didn't really talk to them much. But I was right there with them when TJ dropped to his knee and proposed to Eric in Atlanta. It was beautiful and even though I wasn't in on it as some of the others were, I knew what was going to happen when TJ stood up and pushed away from the table.
They are both wonderful men and although I can't do anything but send my thoughts and prayers at this point, they both know that I'm here if they need some moral support.
And Ryan, I remember you talking about Tony being so sick before, I'm glad you both made it through that hard time and I know that TJ and Eric will make it as well

Shelagh said...

We bitch and moan about it and, God knows it's not perfect, but we're so lucky to have the NHS. Dealing with serious illness is stressful enough for all involved, without the added stress of worrying about how you're going to pay for getting well.

I'd thank you for posting the link, except I'm sitting here bawling like a baby and I know the next stage is going to be really, really pissed off :( It's so wrong that people have to go through that. On the upside, at least there's PayPal, so I don't feel completely useless.

ryan field said...

@Shelagh...here in the US it's even more complicated now. I was on eggshells waiting to hear if my insurnace would be continued or canceled thanks to Obamacare. It's a private plan I've had for years. Thankfully, it was not canceled and I'm fine for now. But many other I know have either lost their insurance or have been shocked to find higher premiums.

@Mary...I'm hoping the same thing, too. Every time I see something TJ posts or writes I get that weird feeling like I'm reliving it all over again. I guess that's the PTSD that never goes away.